Happy Birthday to my dear husband Raghuma!!!

The Broken Bridge - Part 6 and Final

After 2 years of that important conversation that turned our lives altogether is when I received the most unexpected phone call. About her untimely death.
Just before a month of the tragedy, she called me. Telling me about her failing health and the kind of fear that is engulfing her progress in everything in life. She sounded depressed and lost. I have never seen Sindhu being so low and talking about failure, depression and death. First time in life, she was telling me on the arrangements she made for her family back in India and about her property and other things in Germany. I gave her my usual motivational speech, guaranteed her that things will fall in place and she would get better and back to track in life. Once again, I called her to come back to India. This time, Asha joined me in calling her back home. Sindhu promised us that she would come back very soon.
Many times after that distressed call, me and Asha used to talk about Sindhu. Never did we expected that she would come so soon, but this time, wrapped up in a casket. My mind is so heavy and the cars in the distance from where I had been watching them all this while look so tiny to me. Somewhere in the distance I could hear an aeroplane zooming above the building. I wished I took the next flight to Frankfurt. I know I have no reason to do so anymore. The words of Sindhu echoed in my ears. " Asha, I know I need Bala in life. He has become almost everything to me and I also know that it will be equally difficult for me to live without him. But let me tell you the truth. He can never be my husband. Sometimes, you need some people in life, just for what they are and not because what you want them to be in life for you. I am a person who can accept the reality and move on. When I came to India with Bala, one thing that I realised. For me to have his support and emotional bonding, I don't need a commitment called marriage. All I need is an understanding of you that Bala to me is a mentor, guide and a strength who cares for me and helps me to remove my mental blocks to move on with life. As long as you don't suspect our relationship and understand the beautiful bondage of two friends, we don't need to change anything in our lives the way we are living today. I promise you, I had not been his wife anytime. He had been my shoulder to lean on from the day one. If you could accept and be a part of this unique bonding, I think I am all set to go back". I remember Asha suddenly going and embracing Sindhu and giving her a big hug. Later that night, I asked Sindhu, what made her change her decision. She replied, "Asha needs you more than me!". She went back to Frankfurt taking my promise that I would not go there anymore. She broke my bridge! This time for ever!

The Broken Bridge - Part 5

I could not face Asha. It was almost my umpteenth visit to Frankfurt. Asha started to slowly understand why most of my business is happening in Germany. Fears of her own and not wanting to hear me accept the truth and go ahead with the unexpected twists and turns in my life, Asha never dared to ask me straight. But slowly I could see the change in the way she handled children and sometimes with me.
This time I returned from Frankfurt with my decision. It is not that I have some problem being married to Asha, but because I could not run between two parallel priorities. It is going to be tough to handle but unfortunately if one of your priorities take the maxim, you have to make a decision. This time, I returned to India with Sindhu. Asha as usual maintained her composure which in fact surprised me alot, startled me too.
Three of us were sitting in our living room. I started to speak to Asha. "Asha, I know this is not going to be easy..." She stopped me. "No Bala, I don't want to listen to anything. I don't have the energy or strength to listen to you telling me that you love another woman in life. I cannot accept for what so ever reasons, that I have to go on my own for no fault of mine". I felt very painful. There is justice in her words. But sometimes, I hate to understand why love becomes so blind and what is that binds us for unexpected relationships. First time, I felt guilty. I felt stuck between two important people in life. One who has no other world than me, and the other person vulnerable in the open world. For a moment, I wished I did not meet Sindhu again.
"Asha, for heaven's sake, listen to me. Bala had been my greatest strength and my worst weekness ever. I don't deny that. At the same time, I am not a person to break your relationship and build mine. He had been coming to Frankfurt for almost 5 years now, which I am sure you are aware. But understand that I have got to tell you something. Something that is important to all three of us" Sindhu stopped for a while.

The Broken Bridge - Part 4

Asha and kids wanted to come with me on my business trip to Germany. It was summer time for children and I was not able to give them enough time during the last few years and don't remember taking them on a long holiday. So thought I can make this trip a combined one with professional objectives and pleasure time with the family too. After completing my usual work in office, I drove down to the Hotel Hilton. Kids were waiting for me and quickly changed to my casuals and picked the fishing rods and sand castle stuff. Asha commented that sometimes I behave more worse than the kids.... I laughed. Yeah, she is right. After 4 hours in the beach and having good Mexican food on the way back, return to retire in our rooms.
As the night clicked its wings across the black canopy dazzling in a twilight of stars, I could not sleep. My restlessness was new and my intuition was going strong back to my old memories. Slowly I moved away from Asha and kids, and started to walk in the lobby of the lighted Hilton in the night.
I could not believe my eyes when a woman walked into the lobby with her travel bags and was checking into the hotel where I stayed. This is the woman whom I know so well. Never thought that after 3 years I would meet her again. " Sindhu.........." I gave a call in the most slightest voice possible. She turned and gave me a surprise look. " Bala!... Oh,what a pleasant surprise. I never thought we would meet again." So did I. I asked her about her husband and child and her work. Sitting opposite to me in the lobby, she did not speak. Her eyes conveyed her loneliness and betrayal. "Its all over! " She said. I could not ask her more. As she checked into their new hotel room, I also went in with her. Suddenly, she turned and hugged me tightly and cried. I did not stop her. An old friend lending a shoulder to shed the tears. I felt so lifted being able to stand beside her and solace her.
It was in the morning, when I introduced Asha to Sindhu. Sindhu was happy to see my daughter and son and joined us in the long drives and picnics in the same week. Asha initially raised so many questions as to why Sindhu is moved to a hotel, where she is working and what happened to her family and so on. I could not reply to her for I myself do not have those answers. Sometimes, silence is better when words may hurt people's thoughts.
After15 days, of both business and holidaying, it was time for us to return to India. Loads of shopping, memories captured in pictures, and tokens of the places we visited made kids and Asha very excited. Inside me started a train of thoughts on how to leave Sindhu and go back. Made an attempt telling her to come back and start life all over again. She refused, this time, the one decision I expected from her.
Sindhu came to airport to see us off. This time, I found her face brightened up. There are no traces of dejection or a battle in life that she is undergoing. After the flight took off from Frankfurt, it flashed in my head on what made Sindhu look afresh. A new hope. A hope that emerged from my interaction with her. I know, that very soon, I am coming back to Frankfurt.

The Broken Bridge - Part 3

"Bala, Can you drop me at home for my car is gone for service?'' Sindhu called me. I was more than ready to offer her a drop, on condition that she would go for a coffee with me. "You guys are all like this!" . She gave me a free statement along with her acceptance. Moccha, our favourite coffee shop is always full of energy, and young crowd hanging around. Sindhu also loves both coffee and Moccha...so it was my pleasant evening when I could go there with her.

She is such a lively girl that I used to keep on watching her while she is at work. Multi-tasking specialist and very friendly person. A person who strongly believe that women makes better managers as they can get things done by intuitive management. A very revolutionary thoughts of this young woman inspired not just me but lot of my colleagues in senior management.

One day, she called at my desk. I was in midst of my phone call and asked her to sit. She was looking very tensed and troubled. After the call, I asked her what is bothering her. She forwarded her resignation to me. I advised that she is recognised here and have lot of growth opportunities and she should not go just because she gets a salary hike. As usual she was adamant. Sometimes, she is so strong in her decisions, despite the fact that she will not think of it, once taken even if it proves wrong to her later. Knowing her attitude, I signed the acknowledgement and handed over to her.

"Bala, will you not ask me to stay back!" She gave me a jerk with her question and a statement. I replied to her that I already made an attempt to stop her from going. "No, I am not asking you to stop me as my Boss, but you could try to stop me as my................." She stopped there. Took the piece of paper I signed and walked out of the room. I stood from my seat in a kind of disbelief. What did I hear from her now? My mind was boggling me like never before.

The Broken Bridge - Part 2

Asha and me returned home after a long day. The day was full of various emotions and pain. I stood there among hundreds of people, friends, associates, well-wishers and family when she was getting ready for her final journey. The end is only to the mortal remains of a human being who transformed lives around her. Along with me, I have heard people who kept on telling that there can be no death to the person who lives in the thoughts of others. May be this is what is called Atma (The Soul) and its eternity. I think this tragedy had made me give myself a spiritual look, which otherwise was a distant activity in my life.
All through the 24 hours that passed, Asha did not speak to me. I could see a different pain in her eyes. A look that only scared me more. I thought it is natural when a dear one passes away. Did not want to think anything more, and I just went and tried to catch up a quick sleep.
After couple of days, everything started to become normal. Kids started to go to school, and Asha as usual started to become busy at home. I had no rhyme or reason to be away from work. So I called Ram and packed myself to work.
After 3 days of being away, I had loads of tasks to attend. Meetings that got post phoned, proposals that are pending from review, and outlook was over pouring with the mails. By the time I realised that I am hungry, it was 4 pm. For a while I closed my laptop and took a walk to the office cafeteria. With a cup of coffee and a sandwich, I took my usual table and looked outside the window. The cars are all like little ants running behind each other. The fourth lane was full of trucks. Here everything runs. People, Cars, Machines, Shares, Money, in fact everything in the world today just runs! Run! I grimed at myself for not having born in the previous century. Life would have been more peaceful.
Within few days, things started to become much more normal. Once in a while Asha mentioning about the grieving family. I behaved as if I did not listen to her. But inside me, there started a vacuum and a sense of guilt. May be I could have changed the things for her. May be I could have handled issues differently. May be, may be , may be- I got wild at myself for this May be!. Sometimes, just like the ship wrecks, few broken bridges also haunt for life. My broken bridge is no different.

The Broken Bridge - Part 1

It was around 9 pm in the night. I have put children to bed and took a book in hand. My wife Asha is still in the kitchen. I gave a smile, wondering what women keep on doing there. But never dared to ask her that for I don't have time to take it up in case she entrusts the tasks of the kitchen to me in anger!. A man's precaution. My phone rang. Reluctantly expecting another business call, I took the phone. It is the last news that I can expect. My hands started to shiver and panic gripped me all over. I throw ed the phone off, thinking it would let me not hear what I have been hearing on the other side. She is no more.
I know it is going to be a long drive to airport, which is almost now 2 hours journey from home. Asha wanted to come with me, but I told her not to as kids are already sleeping. But I was not sure if I could drive myself. So called the driver and by then started to get ready. As I got into the car, suddenly remembered something and ran inside to pick a thing that I kept for her for long. Was just waiting for her to come back. It is a saree that she pestered me to buy on her birthday.
By then Ram, my driver started to drive towards Airport. I know the flight would only reach by 3 am, but I was not in a position to wait any longer. There is a pain in this waiting. I have waited for her many times in the several years in the past. However, knowing that this is going to be final waiting for her, I wanted it to be long and a lonely wait. Distressed thoughts engulfed my mind and a heaviness surrounded my heart for the first time in the recent past. I closed my eyes in pain. She came as a wave with a smile. I could visualise her in front of me bidding me a final adieu. For a moment, I wanted the phone call to be fake, I wanted my drive to airport to stop, I wanted my thoughts to stop and I wanted my past, present and future to stop. But I know I do not have control on any of these. My driver turned back and gave me a stern look. Probably the few tears that sprang unknowingly would have been the reason for his surprised look at me. What he do not know is that my silence is actually awaiting a roar of trauma of a broken bridge. The river of tear is ready to flow beyond any control. Can men be also capable of such a emotionally disturbed state? I would not have acknowledged had I not come across this painful day. The day I realised that the person of my love is no more.

Obstacles are inevitable in our path to Success!

The journey is tough but not impossible. Everytime I feel that I am stopped by an unsurmoutable obstacle, it reminds me of the Story of Abraham Lincoln, who said that he used to alway fail in his all endeavours till he was 49, and that is the first time he saw success. The success of becoming the President of United States. Another story is of our own Dr Abdul Kalam. Hailing from a poor fisherman family, Dr Kalam is one of the most influential personalities in India who can sway the Young India in the right direction with his magic- the magic of surmounting the obstacles with determination, perseverance and hardwork.
Remember the sequence of incidents that would deter one's confidence and faith to proceed. But still, keep up you spirits high and belief in yourself and the power of God guiding you in the righteousness and this would surely one day achieve the objectives set and success craved for!.

Varavu Ettana, Sellavu Patthana, Bakki Thandana Thandana!!!!

This is a famous song from the ever green Tamil movie "Bhama Vijayam". This movie was released in 1967, those times when there was no fears of recession, big salaries or layoffs. What makes this song relevant now? The fact that this is relevant at all times. Much more now. For simple reason that that consumer's purchasing power was always overtaken by the market's consumer buying behaviour in the recent decades. The buyer behaviour was never in the means and limits of the buyer's purchasing power after the plastic money got its predominance.

The Plastic money or the easy credit laid a bullish impact on the middle class salaried income group who started to spend more than they could actually afford. This does not have a wider impact on the business or the high income groups nor on the low income groups who survive on daily wages and other sources of income. Almost 60% of the spending group comes from the middle layer and this is the layer that is struggling to make both ends meet as the economy and subsequent recession impacts started to show its devilish realities. Cost of living has been increased, inflation floated around 12% and standard of living of the people in general became more high due to the increased consumer's buying behaviour. If 6 out of 10 could afford to pay a price "X" for a product, which other wise could only be sold at "X-1", the seller tendency would be to aim for X or X+1 and this is the chain reaction on what we are seeing in the domestic markets today, be it consumables, food products, perishables or even household goods- everything coming up with inflated high prices.
All is set and done till this segment is hit by recession drastically. Consumers should understand that it is not a situation which has to be blamed, nor we expect the global markets, banks, economy or the government to be held responsible for this dire consequences of the spending habits of the common man. The common man should understand what is his limits and learn to live within the means. Otherwise, it doesn't stop you from singing- Varavu Ettana, Sellavu Pattana, Baki Thandana, Thandana, Thandana!!!!
Let me write more on how this plastic money is actually impacting our pockets!!!!- with more proven statistics on the credit cards management in India.... in my next post!

Troubled with Anger- Borewells or Deathtraps??

It makes me write this post with terrible anger to see a child dying in an open borewell. A huge machinery put into action once the tragedy stuck. Why can't the local authorities, neighbourhoods and people wake up before these incidents happen. Time and again, we have been hearing news of such miserable things around us. 150 feet borewell to 3 feet sanitation manholes, everything is causing a concern in the country. No roads are safe to walk. Thanks to municipalities and corporations who dig pits and forget to close them, manholes that get the irons lids missing, not sure how many people disappeared into the open drains in the country, garbage dump yards which were earlier water beds suck people unknowingly stepping into the traps, electricity boards leave the open cables for the rains to lavish the lives of people walking. Roadways are not immune from not contributing, broken railways gates are not fixed immediately, telephone companies leave the work half done, construction companies leave the concrete slabs in hap-hazard ways for the people to get hit and fall. Who is failing? Government machinery or the people or its a collective failure? How many of us care to close a open pit in our neighbourhood as we cross it. We don't care for something unless we are directly impacted by the carelessness of whoever concerned. Lets stop this attitude. Local councillors should be held responsible for maintaining the local areas... least they can do is pay little more for the garbage collectors on a weekly basis assigning them the responsibility to close the open pits. Media. I hate to describe the way the live televisions covered sonu's death. What the hell is happening in our country. The very media that takes survey of Tom, dick and harry issues, never bother to bring in statistical facts on loopholes in the local machinery, for they are not going to increase their TRPs... Bring in a portal where every citizen journalist can input the minute they find such bore wells, or open manholes and let this list be forwarded to the local authorities... a simple call centre technique..but for us what matters, right... whose bothered.. This is exactly the attitude of everyone, including politicians, bureaucrats, authorities, media and general public unless and until they find some news to debate, gossip, and gather useless views and suggestions. Guys, please wake up, lets make our neighbourhoods safe for our children to survive...Please!

Sister Alphonsa is now Saint Alphonsa

Being a product of St.Theresa's convent and having had the opportunity to look closely into the lives of Sisters who are dedicated to God and serve all their lives, I thought today is definitely a day marking in the history of Catholic community in India. A proud moment when Sister Alphonsa is declared as the Saint by Vatican. A short life of 36 years, full of human suffering that did not stop a soul from her service to her fellow beings, and a person who is believed to be making miracles from her tomb is regarded as the most blessed person in the world today as she attains her sainthood, the highest honour conferred by Vatican.

I have studied in the convent for good 12 years, almost spent my childhood in the lawns of the school maintained by the St.Ann's congregation. Few things that need to be mentioned. Discipline, spiritualistic attention, utmost care, unparalleled love and a great amount of service. I know few sisters who have not gone back to families for ages. To them, we the students were everything. They used to nurture us like flowers in a garden. One or two used to be very angry and show their temperaments on us, but again, they are also human beings. Overall, they are the self-less souls who had taken up the most toughest decisions to be nuns, for it is not easy a task to do. But I have not seen any of them regretting their decision, they did their chores with happiness and a contentment. Unlike what I hear in general, there was never a thrust upon us for converting or what so ever.
Every Good Friday, we got a chance to look at the old movie"Karunamayudu" or "Dayamayudu" and I remember lot of children sitting and crying along with the sisters watching Christ getting crucified. Christmas was time to rejoice, for we always celebrated the festival either on Dec 21 or 22, just before our holidays began. I remember one of my friend who always donned the role of Mother Mary and one another, a girl cutely dress up as Jesus Christ. One play that is still getting enacted in the school on this day is "The Last Judgement". I remember shouting on the stage one day "You too Brutus.." and falling down to the ground. I have been one among the sheep, one among the three wise men from east, remember my younger sister as an Angel always standing next to the Baby Jesus..and it was all fun. The sisters rediscovered their happiness and life in seeing us grow and become good citizens. When I took my family to the school after 10 long years, I was stuck with amazement when most of my teachers recognised me and sisters took me inside the convent, a rare instance. I got my chocolates from them after several years.....that's my love for my Alma Mater.

Finance Ministers Urge to maintain CALM??

Did I hear it right in the morning news? Finance Ministers urging people to maintain Calm??. I once again looked into the news in detail. I know its not the time to be too pessimistic but it also do not give us enough reasons to be optimistic the way we are always. Its getting very hard not to believe that the global contagion is getting hit from all sides and struggling to keep intact what was other wise a smooth sail so far. Never in the history have heard COUNTRIES going BANKRUPT. With the news of ICELAND in the brink of bankruptcy, it urges us to look deeper into the economic transformation of the world happening in the last few days. Rumours are that Pakistan is next in line.
What is happening in India? For those who for several years have made a hue and cry that Indian banks are not totally privatised, I think it is now time to acknowledge the fact that we are more regularised and regulated Financial System with India leading the growth trajectory, exercising caution always. Other than complaints on a poor service, I think most of the public sector banks do have a very regularised lending pattern which saves them from the economic turbulence. Except for the rumours on ICICI, there are no major consequences on the Indian Banking industry.
Somehow, it does not give us a sense of security when it is been repeatedly said by every economist and bureaucrats of the country that our fundamentals are strong. Then why is the sensex dipping day by day as a reflection of the global markets. RBI Governor's repeated statements that we are not having a direct impact raises its own direct questions, then why is RBI introducing the dreadful p-notes which were curtailed from the market earlier? Why are measures taken to cut the CRR rates for 7.5% and what makes him be in Washinton DC discussing consequences with the worlds' finance ministers if every thing back home is safe and secured?? May be the new governor Dr Subba Rao have lot more work to do and challenges to upkeep the reputation created by his predecessor Y V Reddy.
The sensex and nifty is going low every day making investors and companies have sleepless nights and it is impacting the every corner of the Indian economy no doubt. So there cannot be a wave of calmness unless people are rest assured that we are not sinking along with the global ships. Time to maintain calm, I doubt. Least we could do being born optimists is that to keep trying for what our finance ministry is asking us to do!!!

Blogging Bug Bitten me strong

Lot of my classmates would vouch that I am bug bitten by imagination. If talking had been my USP, story telling is part of it. In this process, I have gained few people and lost few too. But what doesnt really stop is my talking! Can't help!...Now that I have less or literally no people who would listen to my scrap, I think I am happy talking what I feel like in my blog. Its like praticising tennis or squash in a closed net room, just yourself. It helps, for there is no opponent who would judge you or get irritated if you take time to practise. Happy I am for I have born in a country where I have freedom of speech. Blogging had become a habit, to show our reactions, emotions, thoughts, justifications and validations of what is happening around us. Ranging from current affairs, travel, social issues, economy,people issues, jobs, organizations, products and services, you will find millions of bloggers expressing their views, opinions, suggestions and information on net. In one way, these bloggers are recording history. Bloggers do it for their self satisfaction, finding it a right platform of expression and also chronologically assessing the changes happening in the world. Sooner,this would become a profession. People like Amit Agarwal had already made a beginning whereas Amitabh proclaims that he is an addict to his blog. So we are! It doesn't mean that we neglect our core responsibility. This has become an outlet for millions of people across the world. I am not an exception to this fact. No wonder if this becomes an industry on its own and gets into the more organized sector of media. No one can deny the power of pen to the sword ... the only difference is its no more just a pen, but what shares is the keyboard as well!!!!Blogging is fun, a passion, an expression, an way of creating history. Be part of it. Enjoy it , cherish it and never use it to hurt others. Be yourself!!!

Kabuliwala

It was a cold winter morning. Men were all sleeping in the village outside their houses on the wooden cots. Most of the doors of the homes were not locked. There was no fear of theft or any other reason for the people of the village to close their doors. The old clock stuck 4 a.m and birds started their crippling sounds making attempts to begin their fly for the day. People could hear the sound of the kabuliwala in a distance... singing the fate of the day in front of every house and going on...
Slowly the elder women started to wake up and water their lawns and draw the kolams before sunrise.
"Kamala, Kamala, get up and get ready before sun-rise" Called the father at 5 am. The bullock cart got ready and the family of two daughters, parents and grandparents set to the weekly village fair. Kamala came out and suddently noticed her father talking to the Kabuliwala. She brought him the tea in a mud cup and the old kabuliwala looked at her.
" Bless you my child. Huh,, don't know how you are going to live?" and he gave back the cup to her and went off. Father stood looking in the way the old man went.
Kamala did not understand the statement. She asked her father what he meant. His father smiled and patted her on the back and got into the cart and all of them drove away.
On the way back, she could not hold her inquisitiveness and asked her father what the kabuliwala said.
"Kamala, he is my friend for ages, for every day he said that I am going to do good, things went so well for me. Today for the first time, he told me good bye. Even I don't understand what he meant".... explained the father.
Few days later, the father died suddenly in an accident. Unusually, the kabuliwala did not come to the street for that week. Kamala was shocked. Is that what the kabuliwala already indicated to her and her family. She could not believe it.
Kamala with her family left to the town to stay with her maternal uncle's family after the tragedy. It was after several years, that she suddenly came across Kabuliwala in a railway station. She ran behind him and caught him to speak.
"Sir, what you said year backs, I am still not able to understand? Can you explain to me " For this question from Kamala, Kabuliwala said that they go by the intuition to predict things and when the predictions happen for wrong reasons, they leave the place and go. He had hinted that he may not see her father after that day and that is what had happened and he could not return to the village where his old friend is no more. Kamala looked bewildered, was it his friendship that made him have this instinct or is the concept of kabuliwala real...she stood there still wondering as the old man took his next train...........

Sa Re Ga Ma Pa

Music is one thing that binds the world. It does not have boundaries of Nations, it does not stop with one media, it does not have limitations of language, religion, caste, creed or community. It does not stop with an instrument or a way of performance. Be it Hindustani, Classical, Folk, Carnatic or Western, what ultimately becomes a world class phenomenon is when the listener's get immersed in it.

SaReGaMaPa- A hunt for the world's best talent is currently going on. What makes it a pride thing is when our brothers from Pakistan sing our songs with the same pitch and vibes, it makes us recall the 20 year old of song that first came in DD- Miley sur mera thumara.... only wish we never had this split with Pakistan and as Mrs Sarada Ramani, CEO of CI International says, our country would have been the world best in many things long time back for our energies would not have been diverted to resolve issues with our neighbouring countries. Hope SaReGaMaPa and many other such events bring back a little amount of solace to other-wise troubled neighbours. Hats off to Zee TV for this endeavour.

హేల్లపురి కాలింగ్ యు బ్యాక్

ఏ దేసమేగిన ఎందు కాలిడిన పొగడరా నీ తల్లి బుమ్మీ బారతి నే, నిల్లుపుర నీ జాతి నిందు గవ్రవము
కానంతరాలు దాతి వచ్చిన, ఎన్నో ఏళ్ళు గడిచిపోయిన మనసూ మాత్రం పుటిన ఉరుకీ పరుగులు తిసుడ్నది. శ్రీ శ్రీ కవిత్వం లాగా పరుగులు తిస్తున నా అలచోనలికి సరిహదు లేయకుండా వస్తునాయి. గోదావరి గట్టు కింద కూచొని ఎద్దుసతున పిల్లవాడిల్ల చిళ్ల చిల్ల వినిపిస్తునాద్ఐ నా మనసు. రా అన్తునది నా బల్ల్యం , నా కోసం రా అన్తునది నా తొలి ప్రేమ , నా కోసమేయ్న రా అన్తునారూ నాన ..ఎవరికోసం కాకా పోయిన, నా కోసమీ నెయ్నూ నా ఉరికి పరుగులూ తిస్తునా ప్రతి రోజ్జు నా ఊహలలొ

Be a Sun when you are alone- Shine as a star when you are around!

Utterly bitterly being alone
Hardly have time to be frown
For I am happy being myself
Encompassing every gulf
Nor do I miss my day with fun
For I smile at myself in the run
I look upon the sky and the sun
Smiled at him for he is all alone
The night came to my thought
I smiled back at the moon in twilight
For I know for sure, I have more fun
Being one amongst the stars to run!

Fatima Oldage Home- A Shelter for the autumn leaves

With a heavy heart went in search of the Fatima Trust and Oldage Home in Thoraipakkam in Chennai, after knowing that one of my old aunt who is ailing, bedridden and counting days is moved to this oldage home. First time in life, I felt so useless to myself, for I could not help the situation for her. I cursed myself for having little or no possibility to take care of her bringing her home and was silently in tears as we were nearing the place. Sometimes though our hearts ache and urge for making things differently, our unfortunate circumstances do not support our thoughts. My situation was very much the same, for this aunt was widowed at a very young age, had no children, and worked as a school teacher and retired, and she had been very close to me as a child. I stood with shame and helplessness for a moment.
But my feelings got a better solace as I stepped inside. The place is well maintained, and inmates are well taken care of by providing appropriate diet on time, medical care being provided, and the caretaker taking full efforts to make the place a real home. Thankfully I found that people found company in each other and lot many returned my smile with real happiness to see a visitor. Almost 70% of the inmates were sick and needed medical attention and timely care. I was amazed to see an old freedom fighter having all his photos, certificates and memories hanging in his room and was taken by awe to see our National Flag near his pillow. Inadvertently I went ahead to salute him with pride. Then I took few minutes to talk to the care-taker and discuss about the welfare of my aunt. Talking to her I felt, that she is in the safe hands of a person who have abundant care and love for her fellow human beings. I was shocked to hear that most of the inmates want the final journey to be made from the home and the home also takes care of doing this most pious responsibility. I had no words. All I could do is stand up and put both my hands together in salutation to the care-taker and walk ahead without looking back.....
On the way back, glad my husband told me that we would one day run such an institution when both time and money permits and do our best back to the society. I did not reply him. Tears flooded my eyes and thoughts!!!

Live-In Relationships- A new paradigm in India

Off late, people have been running behind issues that exist in India for a long while. But now the run is different. The chase is for legalizing and institutionalizing every thing with an opinion to keep in pace with the changing world. The issue of legalizing homo-sexual relationships, accepting gay marriages, providing legal status to transgender, streamlining and legalizing prostitution and now the government’s intervention to legalize live-in relationships, and giving the status of "wife" to the woman involved. People who had their own reasons why they could not bind themselves as man and wife in a marriage will now have to think about this new emerging proposal. There are multiple ways of looking at this issue.
Let’s look into the way people who support this proposal assume and otherwise:
A legal status to the relationship, so that in case something happens to the man, the woman in live-in will get a legal status to claim his property etc as a legal heir.
Neither the man nor the woman can escape the binding factors under law once they started to live together for what so ever reasons.
The statement in the proposal of the "Reasonable time" has to be defined. Or else, for few people living once together would become a life time emotion, and how can you define what is a considerable amount of time in such a situation.
This also raises questions on what happens in cases where a married man or a woman is having another relationship under the tag "live-in". Will the first husband or the first wife lose their legal status once the extra-marital affair gets legalized under the live-in law?
The proposal talks about benefiting the urban communities where this change is become inevitable as lot of people are in live-in relationships to the given fact that they cannot bind to the marriage due to work pressure and other commitment factors- Then what is that this new law is going to achieve, when the people involved themselves do not want to have a commitment, that is the very objective of people in live-in relationships why they don't tie the knot?
The proposal also states that the rural woman will be protected as most of the men end up in polygamy where there exists no legal right for the second wife under law. There arises another question- Are you legalizing multiple marriages or multiple wives by giving the second wife a legal status as well under the tag of live-in? In such cases, does the woman also have an equal right to have multiple husbands? This sound absurd and illogical.
Can the man and wife in the live-in also divorce and does the existing law of separation apply to them as well?
When a law is made and an amendment done at a government level, the proposal should consider all aspects of the issue. Above statements are the points showing the weaker side of the proposed law. It is for the government and legal framework to dig deep into the issue with wide statistics that need to be considered before this become a new law in the country. To me this proposal looks like a mixed up requirements with no clarity- Cant help being a business analyst!!
The other side of the coin- For those who talk about Culture and Heritage.
What is culture- Culture is the way in which people live over civilizations in a country. If the current civilization has a changed way of living, accept it. Look at the larger picture of people in the country today. There are no more Rama's nor there are any Draupadi's in the country today. Our culture, our epics and our heritage had references to the live-in relationships. When we could regard Pandavas being born to Kunti for each God, and for the country which believes in Lord Shiva and Lord Vishnu's Mohini avatar, and lot many other references, Jesus was blessed to Mother Mary... and lot more, what is that you are contradicting the live-in relationships stating not in our culture. Instead of referring culture as a reason, I would suggest people think from other areas - like this may encourage mutiple partners, throw in more of health hazards and disrupt the sacred Institution of Marriage in its present form which is regarded as the world- best institution. I am not supporting the proposal as is, but definitely would support the emotions of the people who are into such a relationship for what ever known personal reasons. As long as the major questions of this proposal are addressed, the country can vote for the proposal. Unless the clarity is arrived and people do not get caught unaware of the loopholes of the new law, this can go. Otherwise, this will become a well dug deep to bury everyone involved- both emotionally and legally!
This reminds me of a line- "My kids and your kids play with our kids"
How is this concept in rest of the world:
To the western and European world, this concept is not new. But the law becomes a binding factor when there are children out of the live-in relationships. Irrespective of whether the father and mother are married or no, the child get the legal status as a legal heir to both the parents individually. Such parents end up in a contratual obligation for sharing the responsibility of the children even if they decide to part ways later or stay together. If they decide to part without children, then there is no legal binding where the partners can claim alimony or legal rights to the property of the person with whom they lived for a while. I have seen people who got married when they had teenage children and when they thought that their relationships can work for a life time. Government's current proposal should see the proven theories of the world to make it a more practically viable law that can be accepted by the people of the country. Its not like some one wrote some rules fifty years back and we are still bound to follow them..Things are changed a lot in Modern India and this should be reflected in our policies and proposals as well.
A last statement- My Opinion:
This is something personal to people involved. There are thousands of social issues that the government can really look into like providing shelther to homeless, eradicating poverty, providing wide spread employment opportunities, making India a world class tourist destination, protecting people against communal violence and terrorism, making proposals for people's participation in Army and Border security, providing support to military personnel who are risking the lives to protect our Nation and lot many. Instead of diverting our attention to issues that people can handle themselves, it is for the government to concentrate more on the major issues that are common to everyone in this country. If they are really serious of making laws, I would suggest Government looks at making amendements to the existing books of law that were written in pre-independence era - Like Rs 500 fine for a rape accused, 5 years of prisonment for a drunken drive killer and a fine of Rs 100 for person who breaks a law at the fall of a hat! Wake Up India. Wake up for real burning issues that my country is bleeding with...

An Ardent Quest

From the time I was born
I run behind the things I want
The red ball in the corner of the room
which my maid pushed with the broom
I crawled to get it back
Tried walking little slack
When I could walk a little
To me everything was a riddle
A bud turning into a flower
and a brook flowing into a river
Wondered how the birds fly
and why do the children cry
As a grown up, the quest continued
to know what I want to be in life
Everything planned went ingenuous
unplanned happiness sprang in recess
The quest did not subsidize
Became an wild fire is disguise
The quest continues to haunt
from the cradle to my grave
Not able to think beyond best
for I am happy with my ardent quest!!!