Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Mid-life crisis setting in! Sooner may be!

Suddenly in midst of a busy day, I took one minute back from my laptop and was wondering what is happening to me these days...a dawn of realization that its almost 10 years that I started to work and build a career (hope so!), and in the process making so many adjustments and compromises in life. I called about these compromises as Re-Alignments in life in my book "Never Say Quit".

Just the next minute, I rang my mentor and friend in India, and asked him on how about getting an admission for me in the Law College. I am sure, I drove him crazy!! For one reason, he knows its my childhood aspiration and for second reason, my career got set in a totally different direction altogether in the last decade of work. Strong feeling that I would make my place in Law, truly makes me think to restart it all over again...Goodness, whats happening...Suddenly I find my kid of my height, grown up and having her own aspirations and goals, my man greying even better, wrinkles started to show on my face, and all old friends are busy with their different ways of lives!!!

10 years of hardwork, perserverance and the results! Overcoming personal tragedies, owning a two bed room apartment, a small family car, few short holidays,long family time in US, a book in making, hundreds of inspiring collegues and friends, four inspiring managers, professional awards and recognistions both inside and outside office, Inner wheel,Counselling and rebuilding so many families around, golf, couple of TV shows with the family, new borns in the extended family and Aishu's music, friends and hannah montana becoming part of our lives with her fantasies...then.few tragedies, losing few loved one's, fire accident, fantasies, betrayals and hurt..losing my unborn son.. Is that all? I am sure, I am doing better but could have been much better!!! Over the years, me and my husband became very close and understanding making our's a real happy family. In the last few years, I have been building up a unique bonding with my mom, that I failed to understand as a child or a teen. My sisters and their families are my internal strength and my mentor is my anchor always...Still, I feel the life is large to contain more and I have so much to do!!!

How fast and how quick! Much more work to do!!! So many things, planning my child's higher education, our retirment lives, taking onto freelance journalism, complete learning German and few more languages, getting into either law or film making, travelling across India first and then the world, help all friends to the extent possible, build an old age home (that’s Raghu's dream), and finally manage to have a pet dog at home...(Aishu wants it always!Me tooo!), create a terrace garden, build a home library, grow mushrooms (yes, you got me right, wanna provide employment opportunities to women with small endeavours around), and finally retreat into the silence of our final destination - pondicherry- to the abode of Ashram and its serenity, divinity and silence...

Huh! Real Mid life Crisis I know! I am in! But Thank God, I have a purpose to live. A purpose to Aspire, A purpose to dream for and live on! I am sure, we all go through these anxities and also know to handle them. Good Luck!