Do Not Let Her Die! AMMA - A saga and an era of glory and empowerment of women ! A Charismatic Leader

It may or may not be her time yet,

why speculate on her health!

Stop wanting her to die 

even if it is the truth that would not sink in

Like you and Me,

She is also a human being!

We all fall sick, go fragile

wanting care and rest !

All of us will one day go!

leaving behind the power and human body!

We will take the paradise gates

That's the only human final destination!

She is a leader, a most charismatic one

Roaring with her voice and opinions

Redeemed a lot with her achievements!

What did she personally achieve!

Family? Peace? Health? 

Wealth and Power gave her a ego boost

Governance had been her mantra in life

Like all aged women, she is fragile now

She will recover and come if God will

Let her take her time to recuperate!

Don't speculate her death and damage

After all, she is no ordinary woman!

She is the 'Thanga Talaivi' like her fans call

AMMA to the masses 

Queen of the Tamil Silver screen

Supreme reign of the Tamilnadu Politics

It is so cheap and mean

with rumors spreading about her 

Even if it is truth, let us respect the human being

for what she is!  The charismatic leader

Do not kill a living legend

let her live long and reign along 

for she leaves behind none to be called her own

She came alone to this world

living alone amidst the crowd

like you and me, she may also go alone!

what would be left behind are deeper footprints

and bigger shoes to fill and feel

May you Amma,  Selvi JJ ,  come back with good health and rule the land that masses have voted you to run the government!

As a responsible leader, people are concerned about your welfare and hence the speculations.   Keeping all aside, we would wish you speedy recovery.  God willing, what is best will be wished to happen for your good and the good of the masses!

 

 

Day 46- Every Day Inspirations - Does Socialism works?

An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before, but had recently failed an entire class. That class had insisted that socialism worked well since no one would be poor and no one would be rich, thus providing a great equalizer.

The professor then said, "OK, we will have an experiment in this class on the Socialist plan".... All grades will be averaged and everyone will receive the same grade, so no one will fail and no one will receive an A.....After the first test, the grades were averaged and everyone got a B. The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy. As the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too so they likewise studied little

.
The second test average was a D! No one was happy.

When the 3rd test rolled around, the average was an F.

As the tests proceeded, the scores never increased as bickering, blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one was motivated to study for the benefit of anyone else.

To their great surprise, ALL FAILED and the professor told them that socialism would also ultimately fail because when the reward (and risk) is great, the effort to succeed is great, but when government takes all the reward away, no one will work really hard to succeed.

Could not be any simpler than that.

These are possibly the 5 best sentences you'll ever read and all applicable to this experiment:

1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it!
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation.

-   Author Unknown ( Source:  Internet)

Day 30- Every Day Inspirations - She ends the Indulgence! - Short Fiction

I wrote in my diary sarcastically calling it  'the gift that keeps on giving'.    It had been several months now that he is binding me from all sides.   Be it profession, personal life, dreams, hobbies, emotional and physical well-being, he seems to be appearing everywhere around..    I know that the skeleton would fall out of the cupboard any time sooner than later.   Finding a soul-mate!   I smiled to myself.

 I cursed Shankar  for having come in my life very late.  But with a spouse who is around me all the time, I still managed to get time with Shankar.   Going on long drives, sharing a silent candle-lit dinner,  sitting on the beach and watching children play football,  little dare-to-do kisses and hugs in the privacy of the car,  walking around holding hands on the highway and further more, driving down few hundred miles to the privacy of a new town for the unimaginable ecstasy of romance that had a special cupid touch.  I felt all my essential emotional needs being met when Shankar is around.   

What started as a meeting 'over a cup of coffee' ,  soon became frequent.     Without knowing,  friendship bloomed into a physical relationship.   'Paru!  Paru!'  - Shankar called me back to the present world.    

'What are you thinking so deeply dear?'   - He asked with all concern.

I replied rather sternly -  'Will you introduce me to the client as your wife?'     Shankar took back for a moment from holding my hand.   I could see a sense of discomfort in the way he reacted.   

'Why should I introduce you as my wife?'   He asked.   I said, 'because I am your WIFE! "  stressing the word Wife!

'You are my wife.  You are my everything dear' -  He confessed holding my hands.  

'Then tell to this world the same thing Shankar'   -  My voice shivered in pain and I could sense the fury, anger and desperation to myself.     I know he cannot.  I also know that he will not leave his wife or child for me.  Sametime, I am also aware that he will not leave me.   I know he loves me.  But I am confused.  I am lost.

'Trust me Paru!  Please'.  We are living happily as we can.  You know that I will do anything for you.  I am happy with you and you are also happy with me.'  I can hear Shankar trying to convince me.

But my mind is racing against the facts...the reality which is far from the indulgence of my extra marital affair.  I know that my husband will be hurt and feel terrible and respond with challenges that I cannot handle if he comes to know of this relationship.   Yet, I am asking him the questions to which I myself do not have answers. 

The health of my relationships within my family, friends and the community is largely happy and respected one.  So does his broad circle of life he has outside my relationship in his life.  

'Go tell your wife, that you are cheating her.  Tell her that you want to leave her and marry me! '   I shouted at him in the car when he tried to hold my hand and pacify me.  

'What happened to you Paru!  You are never like this.  Why are you becoming a stubborn horse?'   - I can see pain in his eyes and care in his voice.   

'I want to be your pregnant.' -  I told him bluntly without a second thought.   I know what he would respond as well.   But I really did not know what I wanted to hear from him the night I decided to really introspect my indulgence with him

'Don't be a fool Paru.   You know you cannot go ahead with the decision.   You also know that you will not welcome an illegitimate child to this world?  Still do you want to be a pregnant with me?'   -  This time, I could hear his anger and frustration.  

'See, See,  I told you.  What ever it may be, I am still your KEEP.  I am not your wife.  Had it been the honesty of me being your wife, you would have loved to hear me with what I wanted.'.   

I could hear the warning bells ringing inside me not to provoke his anger further.  But my words are not getting under control.  My thoughts are racing against my rational judgement.  The lies of the relationship is hurting my self-esteem and causing a deep sense of insecurity.    I want him to understand that I need a recognition.  Recognition as his wife.  

'Paru,  I will do that when time comes.  Finish all your responsibilities and then we shall decide'-   He promised

'Shame on you Shankar.   What the hell do you think of yourself?.  It will take me a life time to settle my children and complete my responsibilities and you will want to give me what I want today after I complete my life? '   I was furious

I know it is all going wrong.  Horribly wrong.  I have no guarantee in this relationship which I honestly want to be ever lasting.  Instead of trying to save it by defusing the situation, I am actually infuriating it towards a forever damage.   My primary relationship of marriage needs all my attention and probably may never end.  If at all he tries to end his present marriage, that may well take several months and not going to end any sooner.  

'I am not able to take this anymore!  Either you marry me and give me a social recognition or just leave me and go! "  -  I shouted.

Paru!  -   I felt a sharp pain on my face as his hand hit me hard.   'Stop the nonsense.  Do you hear me!  Just stop and go home now!'-  Shankar shouted back on me and came to my side of the car and opened the door. 

I could not get down.  I am still in the state of shock.  I felt totally trapped between the 'wants' and the 'should's' of my life.  I felt torn and didn't know what to do!   Just felt broken.   Tears floods down my cheeks as I hid my face in my palms and cried.   He left me to cry.

'I love you Paru.  Do what ever you feel is right.   Just let me know what I should do.   If marriage is the only thing you want,  I will do everything possible to make it happen.   First, you go home and talk to your husband about this and initiate your divorce.  I will wait for you.'   -  Shankar told me softly.

'Leave me Shankar!'.   I told him firmly.   This time, the words came out of my mind than my heart.  'I am tired of this battle between my life and my love.  I know I will be in pain.  Pain for longer time than I can imagine.   Healing will take time.  But I will heal within!.  

I took my bag from the back seat of his car and walked away.   I felt terribly shaken.   But I know I have evolved.  

Evolution from an indulgence that was not easy.   Time will give me the strength.  My needs may change over time,  as I re-evaluate both of our lives.  Tomorrow our children will be happy for the decisions I made today.    They can continue living in the unbroken families.

Shankar stood there, watching me walk away.   As I turned back to see him for one last time,  I saw him leaning over the steering wheel hiding his face in his hands.  I know I have hurt him.  But I also know he will heal.

At the end of time, we are all alone in our journey into awareness, rethinking and reevaluating the decisions made in our lives and who we are becoming.  In the evolution of consciousness, leaving behind a relationship that doesn't work, forced me to look into who I am.  Perhaps for the first time, I have come to understand my short comings and started to work on myself.   

I have one life to live.  Let me make the most of it.  Without giving it a life long trauma in the name of non-existent extra marital affair. Yes,  I am happy I ended it.   It is the end of my indulgence.

Day 13- Every Day Inspirations - The Story of a Care-Giver

She kept looking at the sky.  I could imagine what my wife would be going through, the sort of the day she was having and her mood.   

Face is in the index of mind.  Here, the mind is feeble and not listening.   Rain, Shine and drain, all happens in the same day.  Like a wild boar in the forest, like a hurt caterpillar curled up to rescue, or just like a peacock dancing in the rain.   She could portray everything in one single day and still work with her daily routine.  To be her caregiver was not only tiring but also confusing. 

As I pushed her in the wheel chair to the hospital, this time, I know she was suffering from mixed episode, severe mental condition with moods swinging ferociously with mania, anger, depression and acute agitation, kind of loss and total disconnect.  Her doctor was very kind and he had the patience to help me understand her medicines and also keep them away and give her as per the prescriptions time to time.  Any lapse on my part to do this, will put me at the havoc of running with her to recuperation center trying to revive her back to life.  How can I forget that one afternoon she pushed me into that state of helplessness?   Medicines and treatment that made her get annoyed and more restless.  But we had no choice but to listen to our doctor.  Patience.  Perseverance.  I know my inner spiritual strength is helping me as her care taker.

Her mental pain created a mess causing disturbing episodes of anger and argument with my parents and family.  Not everyone can understand her illness which is driving her and cannot endure what I do.  I just stay calm for I know that arguments or justification will only lead her to get agitated  and in a mood.  There are times, when I just give up being a peacemaker.  I feel like giving her a slap to make her shut up.  I want to kick her out of our house.  I am also a human and there are times that I just lose my patience.  But I still endure. 

She strives to orchestrate activities that keep her busy.  She seems to be doing best in everything.  Suddenly she gets lost.  She gets tired.  She shouts for a break.  I silently wish I could say no to her, when she initiates hundred things at a time, triggering another episode of pain, to herself!

I was getting drained, with stress and worry, striving to look after my child, attend my job without losing it and maintain my sanity in the process.   A plethora of moments in the treatment, that cause a deep sense of anxiety.  Will she ever recover?   She was unwell and often required hospitalization for physical illness just because her mind did not give in the immunity that the body requires.  The longer the hospitalization episodes, the wheels of our apple cart seems to be coming off.

Being mentally ill, she often opened the can of worms without even realizing it.  Every past hurt, difficulties with parents and parents-in-laws, past relationships, insecurities, regrets, would often surface during counseling.  Instances of abuse in which she got locked away, disappointments and fear had to be slowly decoded and put back in order for her to move on.  

 

Listening to her favorite classical music, reading her favorite fiction, and creating awesome network of friends and taking steps of recovery at work and focusing on her childhood dream were happy indicators as she slowly limped back to life.

More than 2 years of being on the roller coaster times of illness and to keep her better, I had to stay positive.   Focus on her recovery and our life together.

She gave me love unconditionally and accepted me as a perfect husband with all my imperfections.   She blessed me with a beautiful child as our symbol of love.  She took me around the world and enjoyed every moment as a traveler.  We explored several things together, passionately and in peace.  I gave into love and did not give into negative emotions of anger, fear and hurt in spite of my own moments of uncertainty.

Life is just inevitable, with its own package of challenges thrust upon us by no fault of own.   Keeping up my own physical wellness and mental stability was key to keep the challenges under control.  There are so many aspects of our lives that we have no say in.  In whatever we can, it is fine to keep with the ways to control, with the inevitable random nature of things that life throws at us.

It was much easier to explain to the world, when she met with the car accident in one of her business trips.   Her bruises and cuts on the face showed her pain and was much easier for others to understand what was going on.  They contemplated her path to recovery.   Prayers and wishes kept pouring in till she got her physical broken parts were put back in place and got back to action.

But I had no particular way to make people understand her pain.  The stigma of mental illness did not allow me to even share the episodes of her hospitalization with family and friends.   However, I am just thankful to the awesome recovery which overtime, was a firm build of gratitude that became a massive relief for me.  I don’t need to explain to this world.  As long as I stay in her world and manage her.

Deadly silent nights when she would scroll through her entire friends list on the phone and find no one whom she could call and speak her heart out, she used to call me and cry for help.  The hours of uncertainty, doubt, worry, and pain doubled when she was ill.   Yet, she made every effort and listened to every suggestion of her doctor and kept her strong will sustain.   Miracles started to happen.  

Her episodes are not completely gone.  Though they are not that frequent, she does get into a state of despair making me wonder what recovery she had.  But both of us kept our hopes high and faith strong.  We will together fight it. 

I don’t want to question myself if she would change for good or bad permanently.  Neither do I have the miniscule doubt of her love for me, my child, our family and her profession.   I keep my respect for her and feelings uncompromisable and truthful.   Wishing our worst nightmares never repeat.   Our relationship and love between us all is stronger than ever.   As her best caregiver.  As her husband.  As her friend!  Life goes on!

Make In India Campaign in Association with Government of India.

The Government of India, under the direction of Honorable Prime Minister Narendra Modi, has launched the Make in India Campaign aimed at transforming India into a global Manufacturing hub.  

As an Economic reforms writer and analyst is it great privilege and honor to be part of this campaign that would aim at bringing Economic Growth and sustainable industrial growth and manufacturing avenues in India and I was approached by Foxymoron who are proud to be a part of such an exciting initiative to join the GOI in this initiative and I had to oblige.. 

The initiative operates under 25 different sectors such as Automobiles, Aviation, Construction, Media & Entertainment, Chemicals, Electronic Systems, Railways, Manufacturing and many more.   

The campaign is an attempt to keep India’s money in India. “Come, make in India. Be it plastics or cars or satellites or agricultural products, come make in India.” Prime Minister Modi’s statement encapsulates an urge to strengthen India’s manufacturing sector and build its industrial base nationwide.

As part of this initiative, I was recognized to be part of the campaign and write about this extensively in my blog  www.umasreeraghunath.blogspot.com .  This would be to share in-depth and exclusive insights.  Personal experiences and interviews of people at HANNOVER MESSE (snippets/ bites), as well as Interviews of European businesses who have invested in India or who are considering it.

I personally find this initiative exciting and looking forward to be contributing my part to the campaign from Government of India.    Look forward to more details and detailed analysis on various topics that would contribute to this India Champion Initiative….Let us ‘Make in India’.