Monday, April 13, 2020

Book Review : 'Fall Like a Rose Petal' by AVIS Viswanathan - A book that will take you to realities of life!

Rose Petals
Does not leave the fragrance of the hands 
that have once held them
even after they have fallen to the ground!
Fall Like A Rose Petal by AVIS Viswanathan
Author - AVIS Viswanathan

Exactly, this is the similar impact and feeling as I finished reading AVIS's book 'Fall Like a Rose Petal'.    Its been few days since I finished reading and did not actually get time to pour out to the lessons that book had reminded me rather.  Given all the hectic and erratic work schedules I have, reading a book at a stretch is most of the times not possible.   However, this experience was different.  For almost a week, my every day ended with couple of chapters read, and few re-read as they were so close to me.....and after completing the final page....I sent AVIS, the below given whats-app message

"Hi AVIS...Namaste.  Just finished reading 'Fall like a Rose Petal' book last night.  It was such an amazing journey.  Beautiful narration n valuable lessons of life.  Plenty of takeaways.  Though our situations are different in terms of pain, the way we faced them, reacted n responded can be related.  For few sentences, I kept underlining in the book, is because, they were part of our lives too.   

Life is a beautiful journey and each experience enriches us and going by the flow of it is what makes us live today.   Honestly my respect n love for Vaani grew multi-fold after reading the book...I know you both for long, but few instances where she showed great decision making and resilience n trusting in her love, faith and inner strength is what made me salute her this moment.  Trust me, our children are lucky. One that they have parents who learn from lives,. Yet we let them dream n chase their own passions and we don't burden them with our ups n downs.    Our mothers were no different too.  Only thing is my sisters stood by me all times.  

Next thing is how we don't understand the benevolence of universe. The minute we do, I think, everything becomes bearable, manageable n life livable with happiness n focus on health both physically n mentally.   You and Vaani will always remain in my prayers.  And I will hold you closely as my good friends as well forever.  I will write a detailed review in my blog as time permits.  Just wanted to pour out my thoughts as I kept the book down last night around 1 am....thank you for the book...I want to forgive my brother in law who had similar situations but pushed us to pain n grave situations without acknowledging his mistakes.  I will gift this book to him for he may find few lessons helpful and he lives a better and non worrisome n not hurting life going forward.   Thank you Avis and Vaani.  Sending you loads of love and best wishes.   Life is beautiful. Let's celebrate"

Then you may ask me?  Why this specific review post now?  It is not for AVIS, or for the book, but for me !  How can I not document the key takeaways!

  • The very introduction of how being human beings is itself a spiritual journey takes you one step above the nomenclature of the routine lives.  
  • The assurances of a wife that ' I am there with you, however long this takes.  We have to win!'  - resonated to my own personal experience when life ravaged us with the shadows of Schizophrenia.....This particular assurance among-st spouses or any people in relationship is what makes or breaks a relationship!
  • Why we are going through all this?  Would we live to tell our tale?   -  Again, each one of us will ask during the dire situations that threaten our own existence.    Answering to ourselves affirmatively is the only way out!
  • Faith has replaced fear and we have developed boundless patience.  No longer scared of LIFE.   -   Trust me this is not a spiritual book, but a story of unfortunate circumstances of the writer.   But the inbuilt faith and patience built over several instances is what makes them fearless.   The minute you are fearless...your mind become stronger and agile to face anything
  • If we trust Life's master plan and celebrate living our Life exactly the way it is unfolding, without resisting anything, we will be in bliss, irrespective of our circumstances.  -  It sums it up all...!
  • You live Life, one day at a time, one moment at a time, making each one count!   PRESENT MOMENT!   The only one that you can call your own! 
  • Mouna works brilliantly   -    Yes, it is in those depths of silence, you will get to hear your soul!   Very lately I personally started experiencing this myself and it is absolute bliss
  • The more you hold on, cling to something, the more you suffer.   Nothingness is what you and I are all about.  Live Letting Go!    Powerful words, especially those in love, acquiring wealth, attention,  holding on to past suffer most when we cling on to it for longer than needed.   End of the day what started in dust, ends in it so...so whats the use of holding it !
  • Don't Interpret, Understand -   90% of the time we assume, we interpret in the way it is convenient to us or we are able to understand without properly listening or understanding in the right sense.   So assuming or interpreting leads to misunderstanding of any situations and its better we stop doing this!
  • Shirdi Baba's two point doctrine of Faith and Patience  -  This is the faith and Sai Baba chapter that moved me.   All my childhood, the only places of vacation/travel/pilgrimage..what ever you call it were to Tirupati, Shirdi and Madras and Sabarimala !   Fakir Baba always took prominence at home and when tragedies kept shaking us like hell, I fought with him saying I will never visit his temple again!   Just few months back in Nov 2019, my best friend pulled me to Sai Baba temple and that day I felt sad at my ignorance and cried to myself so much.   Sai Baba's life teaches us a way of life.   Faith or no faith..doesn't matter.  He will protect you once you trust in him.   Feeding those in need, trusting in him and being perseverance brings in the much needed serenity in your life.   Period!   Once he is part of you..He is in you!  Guiding you!
  • Treat someone's need as higher than yours.  Your want may be someone's need.  Giving is the most beautiful part of being human.  Live, Love, Give!     Having been doing this with what ever little I had,  life kept giving me in abundance without asking, the more I started to give.   Giving in any form -   money, time, energy, love, acceptance, care, friendship, without expectation actually gives you back in multi-fold.   
  • Intelligence lies in knowing which parts of your Life you can fix and which parts you can't.    -   This is a way of finding bliss !   This echo with the story time and again shared by Masters like Osho, Sadguru,  Assanji-   saying, if you can change something, why worry!  If you cannot change something, then why worry!   Knowing what you can have and what you cant have and in accepting both is the very crux of the Serenity Prayer 
  • Life will Always go on!     Kalachakram does not stop for anyone or anything.   I thought our lives are all done, the day my dad fell dead in my hands...we survived.   I felt the ground shaking the day I ended up in a bad marriage....we survived.   Heart broken the day I had to let go my second child...I survived the pain..    The song of life doesn't stop for anyone or anything..It just goes on!
  • All Right -  Celebrate Life -   its OK to fail, its ok to lose , its ok to be heart broken, its ok to go penniless....its all part of Life.   As long as we don't let any of the down streams affect our morale or self-esteem and break our confidence,  its all right!   The only sentence that is true is 'This too shall pass!'.  Yes AVIS, you are right when you said -  Humbling experiences are romantic and inspiring to hear, but extremely painful to go through -  Yes, but this too shall pass!
  • Learn to separate ourselves from the situations that haunt, agonize and worry us the most-  and experience Peace.  And the rare state called bliss.    What lies between you and inner peace are layers of worry, guilt, hatred, grief and anger about situations...!  
  • Do not invite suffering by letting the past haunt you and the future worry you -   Neither prejudiced by the past, not in the fear of the future, just live the moment..The Moment!
  • Be the happiness you seek!   Live with what has been ordained.  Magic and miracle of life showering you with abundance!   Celebrate life -   Celebrate Life!
  • Being an emotional fool myself, I could pretty much relate to AVIS words -  Life got me addicted to emotions that as I was soon to discover, were ruinous.   It's ok to be emotional as long as we are in control of the same.  And don't let the emotions override us being practical in any situation
  • Quality of Life -   determined by being loving, caring, laughing, watching nature and being compassionate  .  Right thinking comes from good heath
  • Seek Within and Ye Shall Find!
  • 'To awaken people to the right way of thinking, living, working and winning!'-  Thanks to these words from Philip Sir
  • We are merely executors of a Cosmic Will.   Never claim any of the success as your own.  You are only an instrument
  • A soul-mate is always understanding, demanding,  forgiving, compassionate, teaching and uplifting!    A soul-mate can be your spouse, best friend,  guru, mentor or someone who can match your thoughts and passions and understanding and will be a long lasting relationship.  Glad AVIS and Vaani found this in each other.  Grateful to have learned to Rise in Love!
  • Truth will inspire you.   Life never ceases to surprise you and amaze you.  In every moment you will find beauty, often in completely unexpected places. -   Whereas AVIS found this bliss in a courtroom,  I have found such miracles in hospital ICUs,  office lift, classroom,  one time during the long drive in the car in a blissful evening!  Life could have be lost in nano-seconds, but found miracles raising Life all over again.    See beauty even in pain and in the most unlikely of places.   Treat everything in Life as just another event!  Preconceived notions and expectations ruin our peace. 
  • Forgiveness is freedom.  It is liberating.  -  Forgiveness is not for those forgiven but who has given it without any baggage.  It makes you peaceful,  free from the haunted grudge and pain of the rotten past.  
  • All is fair in love, war and business.  Unable to concentrate on anything else but that, when you are stung by betrayal, are hurt by someone's senseless guile, you feel used,  abused and discarded  -    When you are faced with this situation, the only way to heal faster is to forgive and move on....As AVIS said,  separate the perpetrator and the action.   Also learn to forgive myself!  Give yourself the gift of forgiveness, to yourself and others, you will find peace, love and bliss.
  • Remember Everything and Everyone with Gratitude.
  • Profundity that only the inscrutable ways of life can imbue in a person.   Wanting Inner peace and wanting to be useful rather than wanting to rid ourselves of our problems or wanting to be more successful!    'Be Useful'   - This life for sure has a purpose.  Many a times, our lives goes off in this earnest search.  It is better we be useful to our fellow human beings in the smallest ways possible rather than trying to be behind the endless search.  In each instance of help you give others, when you can find the opportunity of giving,  it makes you rediscover yourself as a human being as AVIS says
  • Bottom line -   Be Happy despite your circumstances

Life is beautiful, like a rose.    However, it does not come without its share of thorns.  Those who know to deal with the thorns and embrace the rose petals to enrich the life with its fragrance....will feel liberated, rejoiced and rejuvenated in every moment that life throws at us.      AVIS and Vaani's life is a reflection of the beauty amidst adversities.   This book does not have a beginning nor an end...just like the human suffering.   As long as we know to rejoice the journey,  life goes on!     It is very easy to judge people from outside.   To be resilient, to be honest, to be in love, to celebrate life despite all its tantrums is never easy.   But those who know to embrace life with all its magic, miracles and mysteries and mountains of pain, love, happiness, sorrows can alone celebrate life and become Happynesswalas - truly like AVIS and Vaani.   God bless you AVIS and family.

Raghunath, Umasree, Vaani, AVIS





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