Today happens to be one of those million thoughts days,,, where thoughts over run the words..Yet in such a bewildered moments, as you pen down your thoughts, you end up relating things and events that inter wine and make your thoughts look confused, happy, sad, hopeful and stressed too...
Today happens to be one big day at my work, where a one year's hard work is finally getting its last leg.. almost like in the last lap of a relay race.. a race that was tough, at times insurmountable, many a time tiring, challenging, commanding my private time, and thoughts, days and nights where we spent as individuals and team towards one single goal. Finally when it is all happening, I am finding it excited, tensed, and almost happy and sad. Happy for its finally happening and sad for its getting to an end. But the sadness is outgrown by the happiness, for the accomplishments and achievements it brought with it. Immense technical details, strong leadership skills, highly regarded interpersonal skills, vibrant communication, one toes on deliverable, quality in our work, team that at time forgot everything than the project, long hours we spent discussing, analyzing, communication, developing, testing, implementing solutions. Ha! What a relief. What a happiness. What a shadow of fear, a fear of being into the new thing after this is over. The happiness of starting it all again, in a new shore, in a new environment, may be in a new technology, new expectations, new customer, new team and new new and everything new.. this indicates a preparedness for change. Reiterating the fact that change is the only constant thing.
Today, personally, I am very happy. My friend's twin daughters Sanju and Sanyu celebrating their birthday today... a beautiful roses those blossomed in Dallas, the beauty of a family that loves me and just there for me always... am excited that the girls are growing..growing so beautifully.
For the first time today, I read a full book..After many long months. A book written by Nicholas Sparks - At First sight... that gives you an insight on love and trust...overwhelming, that I slept only at 4 am after completing the same... In the evening, sat with my friend Manji and watched a movie "13 on way to 30"..what a realistic movie..it was as if reflecting the teen in me in my thirties..At the age of 13, we want to grow fast, grow big, look womanly, find attention, grab big jobs, and become popular. When in reality at 30, everything keeps happening as we dreamt and work towards it, you just wish, you can redo it all over again.. you would just wanna those first teen days to come back,,want the first care of a friend to live for a lifetime, want the first fights in school to continue.. just you keep thinking that you want to really go back to high school... Very True. It happens with me, and I know it happens with my sisters and friends too.
In fact in one way, young mothers are blessed to relive their lives seeing the young daughters grow...I could not help blushing when my kid was talking about being a celebrity in school, something that I could never even think of... yes,,, today because of work, my book reading, and in a urge to do hundred things all today..missed having my usual chat with her online... that's the strength I feel...keeping connected with your dear ones..what happened to that connectedness today....Oh God... I watered my money plant, wanted it get some sunlight after I remembered the plant in the table in my Chennai office getting its required attention yesterday..
Looking at the economy and people's jobs at stake, my heart aches for a while...Being part of this economic slowdown, I can have no better reason than being regretful... one side my happiness is that I can go back to my family very soon..at the same time, I have reasons to be sad as my goals are still half baked... I have shopping to do, I have tasks to complete, I have my book to be published, friends and family to meet and lot of other things. Rejoin my crusade as a Inner wheel member, counsel people as part of Scarf, doing my reading at the blind school, arrange a party for my kid's friends and finally take a day to hit my favorite dance floor. Too much...too many things, too many thoughts.. End of it, Just picked an ice cream and sat to blog... What a beautiful day..... that I named as my MTD!!!
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Obama's speech in Chicago minutes after his victory in Election 2008
President-elect Barack Obama's victory speech in Chicago as released by his campaign.If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible; who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time; who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer. It's the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen; by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the very first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different; that their voice could be that difference. It's the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled - Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America.It's the answer that led those who have been told for so long by so many to be cynical, and fearful, and doubtful of what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day. It's been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, at this defining moment, change has come to America. I just received a very gracious call from Senator McCain. He fought long and hard in this campaign, and he's fought even longer and harder for the country he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot begin to imagine, and we are better off for the service rendered by this brave and selfless leader. I congratulate him and Governor Palin for all they have achieved, and I look forward to working with them to renew this nation's promise in the months ahead.I want to thank my partner in this journey, a man who campaigned from his heart and spoke for the men and women he grew up with on the streets of Scranton and rode with on that train home to Delaware, the Vice President-elect of the United States, Joe Biden. I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last sixteen years, the rock of our family and the love of my life, our nation's next First Lady, Michelle Obama. Sasha and Malia, I love you both so much, and you have earned the new puppy that's coming with us to the White House. And while she's no longer with us, I know my grandmother is watching, along with the family that made me who I am. I miss them tonight, and know that my debt to them is beyond measure. To my campaign manager David Plouffe, my chief strategist David Axelrod, and the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics - you made this happen, and I am forever grateful for what you've sacrificed to get it done. But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to - it belongs to you. I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn't start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington - it began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston.It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give five dollars and ten dollars and twenty dollars to this cause. It grew strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation's apathy; who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep; from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on the doors of perfect strangers; from the millions of Americans who volunteered, and organized, and proved that more than two centuries later, a government of the people, by the people and for the people has not perished from this Earth. This is your victory.I know you didn't do this just to win an election and I know you didn't do it for me. You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime - two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century. Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us. There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after their children fall asleep and wonder how they'll make the mortgage, or pay their doctor's bills, or save enough for college. There is new energy to harness and new jobs to be created; new schools to build and threats to meet and alliances to repair.The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even one term, but America - I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you - we as a people will get there. There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won't agree with every decision or policy I make as President, and we know that government can't solve every problem. But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And above all, I will ask you join in the work of remaking this nation the only way it's been done in America for two-hundred and twenty-one years - block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand. What began twenty-one months ago in the depths of winter must not end on this autumn night. This victory alone is not the change we seek - it is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were. It cannot happen without you. So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism; of service and responsibility where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves, but each other. Let us remember that if this financial crisis taught us anything, it's that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street while Main Street suffers - in this country, we rise or fall as one nation; as one peopleLet us resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long. Let us remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House - a party founded on the values of self-reliance, individual liberty, and national unity. Those are values we all share, and while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress. As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, "We are not enemies, but friends...though passion may have strained it must not break our bonds of affection." And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn - I may not have won your vote, but I hear your voices, I need your help, and I will be your President too. And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of our world - our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand. To those who would tear this world down - we will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security - we support you. And to all those who have wondered if America's beacon still burns as bright - tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from our the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity, and unyielding hope. For that is the true genius of America - that America can change. Our union can be perfected. And what we have already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow.This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that's on my mind tonight is about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta. She's a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election except for one thing - Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old. She was born just a generation past slavery; a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky; when someone like her couldn't vote for two reasons - because she was a woman and because of the color of her skin. And tonight, I think about all that she's seen throughout her century in America - the heartache and the hope; the struggle and the progress; the times we were told that we can't, and the people who pressed on with that American creed: Yes we can. At a time when women's voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed, she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes we can. When there was despair in the dust bowl and depression across the land, she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New Deal, new jobs and a new sense of common purpose. Yes we can. When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world, she was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and a democracy was saved. Yes we can. She was there for the buses in Montgomery, the hoses in Birmingham, a bridge in Selma, and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that "We Shall Overcome." Yes we can.A man touched down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin, a world was connected by our own science and imagination. And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America, through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how America can change. Yes we can. America, we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves - if our children should live to see the next century; if my daughters should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have made? This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment. This is our time - to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the American Dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth - that out of many, we are one; that while we breathe, we hope, and where we are met with cynicism, and doubt, and those who tell us that we can't, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people: Yes We Can. Thank you, God bless you, and may God Bless the United States of America.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Obama- The 44th President of United States
Watching the American Obama fever tonight, it makes me write this with a very deep emotion of a Nation desperate for a real Change. People are crying with Joy, jumping in happiness and celebrating the victory of a black American first time creating a history.. Its just 5 minutes back that Obama created history by hitting 284 count on the Decision 2008 at 11pm EST on 4 Nov 2008 and 333 within 7 minutes- creating a new world history bringing in a wave of amazement, happiness and people's mandate to stop the digging of a nation with a hope of revival, and a new energy. Hatts Off Obama... the world is looking for a young and dynamic leader who could change the lives of the people in United States and bring in a transforming change that the country is awaiting. Personally, to me its a day that I would remember being in US when the history is getting created and only wish this kind of a day dawns in my Nation too, where a real people hero would emerge to make my country get set on the right path... Chicago Grant Park is jumping in joy with a Nation standing in a salute to their new found energy in their new President Sen Barack Obama. A victory over race, ethnic values, beliefs, cross-country cultures, expectations, energy and young vibrant future in making with the New President Barack Obama
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Secular Fabric of my Nation is at stake
India is a 'Sovereign, Socialist, Secular Democratic Republic'. My homeland is known for its tolerance and secularist fabric in which people of various faiths, and the largest diversified society existed in harmony and peace. This pride seems to be no longer holding good and it is an innate pain to see the very edifice on which the fundamentals of a Nation is built is under threat.
Not pointing any specific group or organization, but in general the warmth of co-existence seems to be slowly fading away in the name of language, regional and religion. Today millions of Indians are working in various countries and they are accepted, regarded and respected for the best of the things that Indians are able to transform in the world all over. What is that we are fighting within us in our home? What if the world nations, feel that we are outsiders? Can the economy and global outreach possible? The very people should understand that as far as India is concerned, every city and every state has a responsibility to treat fellow Indians with warmth, care and cooperation. Why can't other state people live in Maharashtra? What is causing havoc in Orissa? Why are certain faiths attacked in Kerala and Karnataka? Whoever it is, raising tantrums in the name of region and language should first realise that we are building our own graves killing the securalistic sentiments of a Nation. India was, is and will be a 'Sovereign, Socialist, Secular Democratic Republic', and the people at large have to join hands to make this possible. Few marginalised and self-centred groups should not be allowed to overtake a Nation's integrity and our pledge in our unity in diversity.
Not pointing any specific group or organization, but in general the warmth of co-existence seems to be slowly fading away in the name of language, regional and religion. Today millions of Indians are working in various countries and they are accepted, regarded and respected for the best of the things that Indians are able to transform in the world all over. What is that we are fighting within us in our home? What if the world nations, feel that we are outsiders? Can the economy and global outreach possible? The very people should understand that as far as India is concerned, every city and every state has a responsibility to treat fellow Indians with warmth, care and cooperation. Why can't other state people live in Maharashtra? What is causing havoc in Orissa? Why are certain faiths attacked in Kerala and Karnataka? Whoever it is, raising tantrums in the name of region and language should first realise that we are building our own graves killing the securalistic sentiments of a Nation. India was, is and will be a 'Sovereign, Socialist, Secular Democratic Republic', and the people at large have to join hands to make this possible. Few marginalised and self-centred groups should not be allowed to overtake a Nation's integrity and our pledge in our unity in diversity.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Monday, October 27, 2008
The Golden Chain
The chain
One day a man saw a old lady, stranded on the side of the road, but even in the dim light of day, he could see she needed help. So he pulled up in front of her Mercedes and got out. His Pontiac was still sputtering when he approached her. Even with the smile on his face, she was worried. No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so. Was he going to hurt her? He didn't look safe; he looked poor and hungry. He could see that she was frightened, standing out there in the cold. He knew how she felt. It was that chill which only fear can put in you. He said, "I'm here to help you, ma'am. Why don't you wait in the car where it's warm? By the way, my name is Bryan Anderson." Well, all she had was a flat tyre, but for an old lady, that was bad enough. Bryan crawled under the car looking for a place to put the jack, skinning his knuckles a time or two. Soon he was able to change the tyre. But he had to get dirty and his hands hurt. As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she rolled down the window and began to talk to him. She told him that she was from St. Louis and was only just passing through. She couldn't thank him enough for coming to her aid. Bryan just smiled as he closed her trunk. The lady asked how much she owed him. Any amount would have been all right with her. She already imagined all the awful things that could have happened had he not stopped. Bryan never thought twice about being paid. This was not a job to him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows there were plenty, who had given him a hand in the past. He had lived his whole life that way, and it never occurred to him to act any other way. He told her that if she really wanted to pay him back, the next time she saw someone who needed help, she could give that person the assistance they needed, and Bryan added, "And think of me." He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a cold and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for home, disappearing into the twilight. A few miles down the road the lady saw a small cafe. She went in to grab a bite to eat, and take the chill off before she made the last leg of her trip home. It was a dingy looking restaurant. Outside were two old gas pumps. The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The waitress came over and brought a clean towel to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet smile, one that even being on her feet for the whole day couldn't erase. The lady noticed the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant, but she never let the strain and aches change her attitude. The old lady wondered how someone who had so little could be so giving to a stranger. Then she remembered Bryan. After the lady finished her meal, she paid with a hundred dollar bill. The waitress quickly went to get change for her hundred dollar bill, but the old lady had slipped right out the door. She was gone by the time the waitress came back. The waitress wondered where the lady could be. Then she noticed something written on the napkin. There were tears in her eyes when she read what the lady wrote: "You don't owe me anything. I have been there too. Somebody once helped me out, the way I'm helping you. If you really want to pay me back, here is what you do: Do not let this chain of love end with you." Under the napkin were four more $100 bills. Well, there were tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to serve, but the waitress made it through another day. That night when she got home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about the money and what the lady had written. How could the lady have known how much she and her husband needed it? With the baby due next month, it was going to be hard.... She knew how worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to her, she gave him a soft kiss and whispered soft and low, "Everything' s going to be all right. I love you, Bryan Anderson."
- Author Unknown
Magic of Mahabalipuram
The best of the Mahabalipuram is its Shore Temple- having the Vishu and Shiva idols inside- still surviving the test of time.. one of the most cherished remains of the era that excelled in sculptural excellence of India
The Tiger Caves of Mahabalipuram, more than 1400 years old, stands tall as testimony to the Indian art and sculptural significance. Mind boggling art in pure granite, carved on a single stone, stands on a sea shore withstanding the wavieries of time and climate. 
The ancient Shiva Temple that represents the artistic beauty and sculptural excellence of 
ancient India.
The ancient Shiva Temple that represents the artistic beauty and sculptural excellence of 
ancient India. Sunday, October 26, 2008
Visit Andhra Pradesh
No post would be idealistic to begin on Travel India, than my birthplace. Having born in a town called Eluru in Andhra Pradesh, I always feel that my country has got a lot more to explore and enjoy. Today, as we Indians enjoy the universe as world travellers, we fail to recognise the warmth and beauty of our homeland. This sequence of Travel India, is an additional endeavour to map the charm and beauty of my mother land.
Ma Telugu Talliki Malleypu dhanda
Ma Kanna Talliki Mangalarathulu
I have grown listening to this dedicated song to Telugu goddess. Andhra is a land of chivalry and pageantry, destined with heritage that speaks of immense wealth and wisdom. Temples that speak volumes of the cultural significance of our land. The artistic beauty in the walls of the temple and fortresses, and rhythm of the lyrics of Ramadas, Annamaya and Thyagaraya kirtanas that unwind us from ourselves to a divine happiness.
Tirumala, the abode of Lord Venkateswara that captures the faith of millions across the globe and the ultimate destination of Hinduism. Srikalahasti Vayu lingam, Srisailam Jyothirlingam, Bhadhrachalam Ramalayam, Dwarakatirumala, Thousand pillar temple in Hanumakonda, 2000 year old Jain temple in Kolanpuka, Pancharma, Dharmapuri, stone carvings of Ramappa temple, Vijayawada kannakadurga.... these temples speak about centuries old heritage and rich culture and traditions of Andhra Pradesh. They stand tall as specimens of old Hindu religion. Mecca masjid of Hyderabad is a centre of Muslim culture, which in fact is thronged by many Hindus as well, showing the unity of people and secularist beliefs of the state
Andhra Pradesh called as the food bowl of India, for its rich agricultural products, and diverse landscape, coastal line, wide variety of wild life and natural beauty. Andhra is also world famous for its spicy food habits and is called as Annapoorna which means, the godess of food. Andhra Pradesh is well known for its beautiful language Telugu regarded as the sweetest Indian language, rich literature and vibrant Kuchipudi dance form. Ruins, Palaces, Museums and Ports that speak about the ancient history of Andhra. India's best pelican refuge at Kolleru lake is regarded as the haven for the migrating birds and one of the famous tourist destinations.
Godavari and Krishna are the two major rivers that flow through the heart of Andhra Pradesh, and glad that I was born in the belt where these two rivers tow into a lake called Tamileru. Tungabadra is one another tributary of Krishna that flows in Andhra. Ancient history mentions Andhra as Dakshina Padh and has reference to more than 100 decades old. Gupta dynasty, Maurya, Challukyas, Kakatiyas and the famous Vijayanagar empire ruled ancient Andhra.
The modern Andhrapradesh produces techies and today every household in Andhra has at least one person working abroad. Education and employment opportunities have welcomes people from all other states in Andhra and other parts of the world and merge with ease and understanding. Buddists, Muslim breatheren and hindu traditions co-exist in peace and harmony in the state capital Hyderabad, which is also the destination for the best of software industry in India. Hyderabad with its changed infrastructure and increased facilities had become a most desired destination for world class companies. Sriharikota stands tall with hosting the nuclear sciences of the Nation and also parenting the strength of a nation's security.
For those who want, to have a holiday in peace, the villages of Andhrapradesh are a must see. Sitting at the banks of river krishna, one can see the happiness as the life flows with its rhyme and rythm, transforming you with a magic spell of nature. That's Andhra for me!
Ma Telugu Talliki Malleypu dhanda
Ma Kanna Talliki Mangalarathulu
I have grown listening to this dedicated song to Telugu goddess. Andhra is a land of chivalry and pageantry, destined with heritage that speaks of immense wealth and wisdom. Temples that speak volumes of the cultural significance of our land. The artistic beauty in the walls of the temple and fortresses, and rhythm of the lyrics of Ramadas, Annamaya and Thyagaraya kirtanas that unwind us from ourselves to a divine happiness.
Tirumala, the abode of Lord Venkateswara that captures the faith of millions across the globe and the ultimate destination of Hinduism. Srikalahasti Vayu lingam, Srisailam Jyothirlingam, Bhadhrachalam Ramalayam, Dwarakatirumala, Thousand pillar temple in Hanumakonda, 2000 year old Jain temple in Kolanpuka, Pancharma, Dharmapuri, stone carvings of Ramappa temple, Vijayawada kannakadurga.... these temples speak about centuries old heritage and rich culture and traditions of Andhra Pradesh. They stand tall as specimens of old Hindu religion. Mecca masjid of Hyderabad is a centre of Muslim culture, which in fact is thronged by many Hindus as well, showing the unity of people and secularist beliefs of the state
Andhra Pradesh called as the food bowl of India, for its rich agricultural products, and diverse landscape, coastal line, wide variety of wild life and natural beauty. Andhra is also world famous for its spicy food habits and is called as Annapoorna which means, the godess of food. Andhra Pradesh is well known for its beautiful language Telugu regarded as the sweetest Indian language, rich literature and vibrant Kuchipudi dance form. Ruins, Palaces, Museums and Ports that speak about the ancient history of Andhra. India's best pelican refuge at Kolleru lake is regarded as the haven for the migrating birds and one of the famous tourist destinations.
Godavari and Krishna are the two major rivers that flow through the heart of Andhra Pradesh, and glad that I was born in the belt where these two rivers tow into a lake called Tamileru. Tungabadra is one another tributary of Krishna that flows in Andhra. Ancient history mentions Andhra as Dakshina Padh and has reference to more than 100 decades old. Gupta dynasty, Maurya, Challukyas, Kakatiyas and the famous Vijayanagar empire ruled ancient Andhra.
The modern Andhrapradesh produces techies and today every household in Andhra has at least one person working abroad. Education and employment opportunities have welcomes people from all other states in Andhra and other parts of the world and merge with ease and understanding. Buddists, Muslim breatheren and hindu traditions co-exist in peace and harmony in the state capital Hyderabad, which is also the destination for the best of software industry in India. Hyderabad with its changed infrastructure and increased facilities had become a most desired destination for world class companies. Sriharikota stands tall with hosting the nuclear sciences of the Nation and also parenting the strength of a nation's security.
For those who want, to have a holiday in peace, the villages of Andhrapradesh are a must see. Sitting at the banks of river krishna, one can see the happiness as the life flows with its rhyme and rythm, transforming you with a magic spell of nature. That's Andhra for me!
Happy Diwali
Diwali is the time of celebration of victory over evil, joy of enjoying the oneness of a country, that raises beyond religions and faiths to celebrate the festival of lights. Diwali is an occasion to unite families and bring in friends together to cherish the happiness of celebrations together.
To me, Diwali reminds me of a nostalgic era that brought with it wonderful memories. The memories of happiness, the memories of having crackers a month ahead, new dresses, lots and lots of sweets and savories, lot of visitors and pujas in the temples. There used to be a competitions on who burst the maximum crackers. The most colourful neighbourhood with Thoranas, rangolies and beautiful girls in half-sarees and young boys trying their first vesties. The charm used to be sharing sweets- most of them home made and the hot and spicy vada and adursam, the one sweet my mom used to make at home...... slowly years went by, changes came in, and city life limited its celebrations to one or two days...Home made sweets replaced the packages came in from Krishna Sweets or Adyar Ananda bhavan- with the same home made taste and the puja ingrediants as well- along with a music cd...the time spent with friends and families slowly started to get replaced by people getting hooked to the special programmes on the TVs..new movies released, the celebrity interviews, and also some programs reminding you of the Diwali purpose and meaning.....when people started to move across the globe, this started becoming an universal festival- White house celebrating Diwali a day ahead...lot of bhajans and puja's organised in the local Hindu temples.. where for that day, people get to be there together in the Indian attire, sings songs together and have food in the communal kitchen, some children tasting Indian sweets first time. The spirit of Diwali do not change, only the way of celebration does.
Wishing all my friends and family a very happy and colourful diwali..let the lights bring in peace, happiness, joy and prosperity. Happy Deepavali!!!
To me, Diwali reminds me of a nostalgic era that brought with it wonderful memories. The memories of happiness, the memories of having crackers a month ahead, new dresses, lots and lots of sweets and savories, lot of visitors and pujas in the temples. There used to be a competitions on who burst the maximum crackers. The most colourful neighbourhood with Thoranas, rangolies and beautiful girls in half-sarees and young boys trying their first vesties. The charm used to be sharing sweets- most of them home made and the hot and spicy vada and adursam, the one sweet my mom used to make at home...... slowly years went by, changes came in, and city life limited its celebrations to one or two days...Home made sweets replaced the packages came in from Krishna Sweets or Adyar Ananda bhavan- with the same home made taste and the puja ingrediants as well- along with a music cd...the time spent with friends and families slowly started to get replaced by people getting hooked to the special programmes on the TVs..new movies released, the celebrity interviews, and also some programs reminding you of the Diwali purpose and meaning.....when people started to move across the globe, this started becoming an universal festival- White house celebrating Diwali a day ahead...lot of bhajans and puja's organised in the local Hindu temples.. where for that day, people get to be there together in the Indian attire, sings songs together and have food in the communal kitchen, some children tasting Indian sweets first time. The spirit of Diwali do not change, only the way of celebration does.
Wishing all my friends and family a very happy and colourful diwali..let the lights bring in peace, happiness, joy and prosperity. Happy Deepavali!!!
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Sandwiched or Empowered? Whazzup!!!
Sandwiched between two powerful siblings
one way felt tough to keep on compete
But the fact is that I am empowered being in between
for one guided me and other followed me all times
Challenge was to learn what I could
when times did not permit me what I wanted to
I think Science is saved for I took commerce
Succeeded did I for it went on with my attitude
Took on a career that came on my way
Had I taken the choice of my heart
Am not sure I would not be where I am
Would have been auditing papers with red inks
I had a choice, either to marry the man whom I loved
or marry the man who loved me,
When I took the second choice as my decision
It only made my life get more meaning
I had a choice, either to do just a CA
or going in for Bcom, HDSE and CWA
When I took the second choice as my decision
that made me a person of both Finance and software tree
I had a choice, to be part of a publishing company
or being on my own as a freelance writer
Taking the second choice made me empowered
for it let me write what I thought
Had a choice to compromise all my life
or at times be a rebel to regain your life
When I took on second toughest choice
success started to come with strong edifice
When I got sandwiched between two people
Always thought who needs me more
That's where I always made my decisions
for there is a need, there will be a care true
Where I got sandwiched between my friends
friends behind whom I loved to hang around
or friends who love to hang on around me
I took the choice 2, for it made a difference to be
Where I got sandwiched to write a fiction or a poem
I always preferred to write a poem
for I can put in my fiction in a rhyme
which can be my strength as a poet too
When I get sandwiched between religion to follow
Born Hindu and an educated christian
to me all religions mattered the same
and I decided to be omni potent human being
When sandwiched between my day and night
I decided not to fight, for at times
A Day makes me shine with newness it brings
and nights let me sleep in the much needed peace
This is nothing but a proclamation that
I am empowered every time,
I feel that I am sandwiched
between two different but important things
Life is nothing but an alignment
to make it more empowered at troubled times
Life is nothing but a passage of time
where you transform everything beside....
one way felt tough to keep on compete
But the fact is that I am empowered being in between
for one guided me and other followed me all times
Challenge was to learn what I could
when times did not permit me what I wanted to
I think Science is saved for I took commerce
Succeeded did I for it went on with my attitude
Took on a career that came on my way
Had I taken the choice of my heart
Am not sure I would not be where I am
Would have been auditing papers with red inks
I had a choice, either to marry the man whom I loved
or marry the man who loved me,
When I took the second choice as my decision
It only made my life get more meaning
I had a choice, either to do just a CA
or going in for Bcom, HDSE and CWA
When I took the second choice as my decision
that made me a person of both Finance and software tree
I had a choice, to be part of a publishing company
or being on my own as a freelance writer
Taking the second choice made me empowered
for it let me write what I thought
Had a choice to compromise all my life
or at times be a rebel to regain your life
When I took on second toughest choice
success started to come with strong edifice
When I got sandwiched between two people
Always thought who needs me more
That's where I always made my decisions
for there is a need, there will be a care true
Where I got sandwiched between my friends
friends behind whom I loved to hang around
or friends who love to hang on around me
I took the choice 2, for it made a difference to be
Where I got sandwiched to write a fiction or a poem
I always preferred to write a poem
for I can put in my fiction in a rhyme
which can be my strength as a poet too
When I get sandwiched between religion to follow
Born Hindu and an educated christian
to me all religions mattered the same
and I decided to be omni potent human being
When sandwiched between my day and night
I decided not to fight, for at times
A Day makes me shine with newness it brings
and nights let me sleep in the much needed peace
This is nothing but a proclamation that
I am empowered every time,
I feel that I am sandwiched
between two different but important things
Life is nothing but an alignment
to make it more empowered at troubled times
Life is nothing but a passage of time
where you transform everything beside....
Monday, October 20, 2008
Kannadasan Endra Kadalai Thondrum Neyram - ( Digging into the well of wealth called Kannadasan)- A Tribute to the ever green Poet
Ponal pohattum poda - intha poomiyil nilaiyai vazhnthavar yaarada. Vanthathu theriyum povathu enge vaasal namakke theriyathu, Vanthavarellam thanki viddal - intha mannil namakke idamtethu, Vazhkai enpathu viyaparam - varum jananam enpathu varavahum - athil maranam enpathu selavaahum.
Meaning - Let the passions and bonds pass-by Who has lived in this land forever? Path of arrival is known - but Path of departure and the route unknown. If all who came opt to stay Where's the space in this sphere? Life is just a business -in which the birth is credit and death is debit
It was in the October 3 rd week, in 1981, that a poet and lyricst Kavingnar Kannadasan left this world at the age of 54. What is left behind is a well of wealth, the wealth of tamil literature in the form of 5000 movie songs, 4000 poems, 30+ novels, and 109 volumes of publications and his children claim that there is much of this great poet which is not published. Looks like an ocean of knowledge. As a poet and writer, I am in a kind of an obsession to the words in his poems, the indepth meaning that makes us go awe in appreciation of his great writings. One more example given below
Veedu varai uravu,Veethi varai manaivi, Kaadu varai pillai, kadaisi varai yaaro? Meaning- The kin, till the house, The wife, till the street, The son, upto the cemetery, Who will come beyond that?
It may be years and years after this was written, but the truth do not change.. so is the one given below:
Aadai inri piranthome - aasai inri piranthoma? Aadi mudikkaiyile alli chenror yaarumundo
Meaning- Though born without a dress, did we come without passions? when we complete the merriment can anyone carry their possessions?
There is one another movie song, that makes you almost silent, for the essence of the lyrics
Ullam enpathu aamai - athil unmai enpathu oomai Sollil varuvathu paathi - nenjil thoonki kidappathu neethi
Meaning - Mind is like a tortoise - in which the truth hides in silence words can bring out only the half while justice calmly sleeps
one more theme that again talks about the sorrows and joys of a common man who still manages to dream, balancing the artimetics of life...
Vazhvil thunbam varavuu suham selavu, iruppathu kanavu kaalam vahutha kanakkai inge yaar kaanuvar?
With my tributes and ardent devotion to a poet who showed a new world in his words.
Thanks to my friend Partha who spent almost 5 hours online to explore Kannadasan over the weekend, translating meaning of his various songs to the otherwise illiterate uma who has no knowledge of Tamil writing. Provoking me to learn the language and explore it and make it a continious saga..... this reminds me of Kavingnar Kanimozhi's words "Ethanna nalla analum, theru en veediyil varavillayey" describing the pain of the poor that the god's chariot has not made to his street.
Poets are not made, they are born!!!.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
The White Tiger - My Review
As a voracious reader who enjoys reading books that are more related to us and near to reality, I do appreciate the bold write of an young Writer Aravind Adiga. Also proud of the way, he made it to the Booker Prize. Aravind Adiga's White Tiger reflects on the injustices and poverty that is still scaring India. The rapidly changing face of India with still persistent problems that we endured for almost 6 decades after Independence in one way reflects India in poor light. The edifice on which the development and growth of the Nation happened and still previaling the rich ruling the poor in the country once again throws us to an debate of the emerging India.
India is currently in the verge of becoming a super power and very shortly accepted as a developed Nation. One way, the book represents the actual India.. In other way, it represents what we could best avoid in a global scenario. This is like the world channels still showing India as a land of elephants, cows and people moving around half naked, sleeping on streets and children carrying concrete bricks for survival.
Unlike most of the critics, I want to highlight one core aspect of Adiga's White Tiger. The huge disparities of wealth , the way rich treats the servants and poor, the greed and theiving which happens in form of growing corruption, is clearly drafted in various sequences in the book. The book also highlights on the emotions, sorrows and aspirations of the invisible poor. In one way, it dares to proclaim that anyone can dream big in this country. The other aspect is not just a villager moving from a rural village to a urban city, the feeling is the same when an Indian immigrates to a foreign land as well. For those who are not exposed to the different cultures, climate, food and way of business, there is always a cultural shock that awaits them.
One thing that hurts me really when took a look deep into Adiga's White Tiger is that it talks more about the bad and troubled things in India. At a time, when India is highly regarded across the globe for the best of hi-tech advancement, human intelligence and we being the best in the fashion world, information technology, science and bio-technology, nuclear physics, spiritual enlightenment, world economy and lot of other good things. I only wish India is shown to the world around for the best of traditions, our rich heritage, our spiritual enrichment, intellectual brilliance, and hardworking Indians, the people of a nation who stand united being so diversified in languages and regions, we should be proud for what best we hold.
I would like to leave a note for Aravind : Think from making the best of your writing skills to promote India for the other side of the coin. I am sure we are no more a land of snake charmers and rope walkers alone with Chandrayan ready to hit the moon coming wednesday. Hats off India, for the way you go towards becoming a developed nation, making Dr Kalam's dream of 2020 a reality very soon.
India is currently in the verge of becoming a super power and very shortly accepted as a developed Nation. One way, the book represents the actual India.. In other way, it represents what we could best avoid in a global scenario. This is like the world channels still showing India as a land of elephants, cows and people moving around half naked, sleeping on streets and children carrying concrete bricks for survival.
Unlike most of the critics, I want to highlight one core aspect of Adiga's White Tiger. The huge disparities of wealth , the way rich treats the servants and poor, the greed and theiving which happens in form of growing corruption, is clearly drafted in various sequences in the book. The book also highlights on the emotions, sorrows and aspirations of the invisible poor. In one way, it dares to proclaim that anyone can dream big in this country. The other aspect is not just a villager moving from a rural village to a urban city, the feeling is the same when an Indian immigrates to a foreign land as well. For those who are not exposed to the different cultures, climate, food and way of business, there is always a cultural shock that awaits them.
One thing that hurts me really when took a look deep into Adiga's White Tiger is that it talks more about the bad and troubled things in India. At a time, when India is highly regarded across the globe for the best of hi-tech advancement, human intelligence and we being the best in the fashion world, information technology, science and bio-technology, nuclear physics, spiritual enlightenment, world economy and lot of other good things. I only wish India is shown to the world around for the best of traditions, our rich heritage, our spiritual enrichment, intellectual brilliance, and hardworking Indians, the people of a nation who stand united being so diversified in languages and regions, we should be proud for what best we hold.
I would like to leave a note for Aravind : Think from making the best of your writing skills to promote India for the other side of the coin. I am sure we are no more a land of snake charmers and rope walkers alone with Chandrayan ready to hit the moon coming wednesday. Hats off India, for the way you go towards becoming a developed nation, making Dr Kalam's dream of 2020 a reality very soon.
Earn-and-Burn Generation
This used to be the usual comment from my friend Hari's father, that we folks do belong to a generation which can be called EB Group. My mom used to sing the same song. The song that they managed families within 4 digit incomes, many more children, limited spending, and safe savings. The usual complaint not just from these two parents but almost all of the retired group that I met was that the young generation do not know the value of money. Most of the young lot would just knock their ideas and suggestions by saying that these people never know to enjoy their lives.
All her life, I have not seen my mom even accepting a debit card from the bank, for she thinks that the 1- 2% charges of the shopping made by swiping the debit cards is also ridiculous. And a credit card is a definite no-no. But to us, plastic money is handy, convenient and a usual thing. What started as a pride to have credit cards, slowly became an addiction to spend more. Thinking that every transaction has a record, and the convenience to purchase what we want at the time of when we want, irrespective of when we could afford in fact had ruined many people who never tried to look at the backside of their credit card bills. The cumulative effect of the interest rates laid, the hidden costs, taxes and service charges, surcharges and every aspect of the charges levied have a Banking Act reference, making it a more legal document. It is like signing an P-note without reading it at all.
In US, I have seen people making payments even for $1 by credit cards. There are no hidden charges that threaten the people here as the system is so regulated and controlled. But that is not the scene in India. We do not have the option of declaring individual bankruptcy and taking the social security to fight our difficult situations. The thing which started as a pride on the day you went to an ATM to draw money from your debit card, lured by the well-trained credit card agents of various banks who made you feel like a king when the offer is made is in long run a doom. Taking multiple credit cards to manage one after the other and finally by just making the minimum balance payments, the 45 day cycle of the credit time given expires to land up in more cumulative costs which the customer is not even aware of. The banks which have their own primary system of call centre followup on credit card payments, and legal letter and notices on defaulters, and subsequent personal visits of the credit collection agents of the banks have also the secondary system of collections. The system of Dada-giri or goonda-giri which I am sure the massive defaulters would know what I am referring to.
The second most biggest threat in a bad economy for the salaried middle class is the EMI's. In 1980's, I have seen people struggling to get a home loan, which was given by LIC, or few banks after so much of documentary verification and assessment. In beginning of 2000, this changed drastically, where Loans were sanctioned at the click of few mouse strokes. Online processing, real estate melas, and limited verifications, and minimum requirements like 2 months salary slips, confirmation from employer, 10 open cheques, few photographs made loans for homes, cars, and foreign education, personal needs like marriages, household goods, foreign travel a reality to many people. All for an easy-monthly-installment.
For almost 40% of the salaried class in urban India today, nearly 20-40% of their monthly income goes of in paying for the credit cards or EMIs.
The Third biggest disadvantage of the EB generation is investing in the speculation market. Nearly 20-25% of the investment of young India is shares and stocks, with limited or near to no knowledge on the markets is a major risk. Expecting high returns, quick money and going by own assessment would prove costlier in a bad economy. The concept of recurring deposits, investments in nationalised banks have considerably reduced.
One good option that survived is investing in the yellow metal and real estate that for sure in India is ever booming. Though in general, we hate to adhere to the advice of our old gen, sometimes, giving a thought too helps.....
All her life, I have not seen my mom even accepting a debit card from the bank, for she thinks that the 1- 2% charges of the shopping made by swiping the debit cards is also ridiculous. And a credit card is a definite no-no. But to us, plastic money is handy, convenient and a usual thing. What started as a pride to have credit cards, slowly became an addiction to spend more. Thinking that every transaction has a record, and the convenience to purchase what we want at the time of when we want, irrespective of when we could afford in fact had ruined many people who never tried to look at the backside of their credit card bills. The cumulative effect of the interest rates laid, the hidden costs, taxes and service charges, surcharges and every aspect of the charges levied have a Banking Act reference, making it a more legal document. It is like signing an P-note without reading it at all.
In US, I have seen people making payments even for $1 by credit cards. There are no hidden charges that threaten the people here as the system is so regulated and controlled. But that is not the scene in India. We do not have the option of declaring individual bankruptcy and taking the social security to fight our difficult situations. The thing which started as a pride on the day you went to an ATM to draw money from your debit card, lured by the well-trained credit card agents of various banks who made you feel like a king when the offer is made is in long run a doom. Taking multiple credit cards to manage one after the other and finally by just making the minimum balance payments, the 45 day cycle of the credit time given expires to land up in more cumulative costs which the customer is not even aware of. The banks which have their own primary system of call centre followup on credit card payments, and legal letter and notices on defaulters, and subsequent personal visits of the credit collection agents of the banks have also the secondary system of collections. The system of Dada-giri or goonda-giri which I am sure the massive defaulters would know what I am referring to.
The second most biggest threat in a bad economy for the salaried middle class is the EMI's. In 1980's, I have seen people struggling to get a home loan, which was given by LIC, or few banks after so much of documentary verification and assessment. In beginning of 2000, this changed drastically, where Loans were sanctioned at the click of few mouse strokes. Online processing, real estate melas, and limited verifications, and minimum requirements like 2 months salary slips, confirmation from employer, 10 open cheques, few photographs made loans for homes, cars, and foreign education, personal needs like marriages, household goods, foreign travel a reality to many people. All for an easy-monthly-installment.
For almost 40% of the salaried class in urban India today, nearly 20-40% of their monthly income goes of in paying for the credit cards or EMIs.
The Third biggest disadvantage of the EB generation is investing in the speculation market. Nearly 20-25% of the investment of young India is shares and stocks, with limited or near to no knowledge on the markets is a major risk. Expecting high returns, quick money and going by own assessment would prove costlier in a bad economy. The concept of recurring deposits, investments in nationalised banks have considerably reduced.
One good option that survived is investing in the yellow metal and real estate that for sure in India is ever booming. Though in general, we hate to adhere to the advice of our old gen, sometimes, giving a thought too helps.....
Attrition coming down to a single digit
First time in the several years, reports have stated that attrition had seen a serious fall from 13% to 8%. This brings in a cheer to the HR community which otherwise struggled for several years with the paper work, resource hunt and a critical match path of the right people for the project needs. HR community also faced a biggest challenge of identifying the right profiles, and over the period of time, became experts to identify fakes certificates and experiences. The wildfire of attrition has stopped in the BPO and IT industry for a while. Major reason being "IT companies stopped hiring". This is a generic statement and there are exceptions like Infosys who are still head hunting. But overall, the market mood is sober and unpredictable.
A year back, the situation was different. Retention was a major concern to organizations with people hopping jobs at the fall of a hat. There were several reasons and major demand across the sector and people took things for granted. Now the Ring of Fire is different. Now it’s the companies which are having a Tea Time. In the sense, that with appraisal cycles round the corner in the last quarter of the year, lot of companies is at the advantage to handle people and their demands in a more passive manner. It would not have been the state a year back. But things are different and people are now backing in form, expecting job security, consistent projects, known environments and loyal atmosphere. This infact is going to bring back the lost loyalty of the people in the organizations. People would now naturally get back to the mode of being connected to the companies they work for. For one reason, they would not like to be detached in such an economy for a job in hand. There is nothing wrong in the change that is going to happen in the mind set of the IT professional, for one reason, that they are seeing such a chain reactions of the economy at a large for the first time after the recession of 2001.
IT companies overall revenue is estimated to be in the range of 40- 65% happening from the Banking, Financial and Insurance industry and related sectors. Travel and hospitality industry also had seen greener days as the IT and BFSI sectors worked towards rapid growth in the last several years. It is time for the ROI for IT companies which have invested on the human capital in terms of training, recruitment, travel, recreation etc. The overall IT spend will be coming down as there are going to be less and less of projects coming from UK and USA at least in the next one to two years. The support, maintenance and operations contracts would still survive. It is going to be very challenging for the sourcing teams who would pursue new projects. Employees also would understand the need to make use of the economies of scale and learning to be contributing to the company cost cuts. The first and foremost responsibility would be for everyone in the organization to feel the need to minimize costs, increase productivity and understand that only the best would survive under such a situation. This paradigm would continue at the current environment where supply is over stripped to the market demand. It’s no more a choice but a nomenclature to live within one's means.
A year back, the situation was different. Retention was a major concern to organizations with people hopping jobs at the fall of a hat. There were several reasons and major demand across the sector and people took things for granted. Now the Ring of Fire is different. Now it’s the companies which are having a Tea Time. In the sense, that with appraisal cycles round the corner in the last quarter of the year, lot of companies is at the advantage to handle people and their demands in a more passive manner. It would not have been the state a year back. But things are different and people are now backing in form, expecting job security, consistent projects, known environments and loyal atmosphere. This infact is going to bring back the lost loyalty of the people in the organizations. People would now naturally get back to the mode of being connected to the companies they work for. For one reason, they would not like to be detached in such an economy for a job in hand. There is nothing wrong in the change that is going to happen in the mind set of the IT professional, for one reason, that they are seeing such a chain reactions of the economy at a large for the first time after the recession of 2001.
IT companies overall revenue is estimated to be in the range of 40- 65% happening from the Banking, Financial and Insurance industry and related sectors. Travel and hospitality industry also had seen greener days as the IT and BFSI sectors worked towards rapid growth in the last several years. It is time for the ROI for IT companies which have invested on the human capital in terms of training, recruitment, travel, recreation etc. The overall IT spend will be coming down as there are going to be less and less of projects coming from UK and USA at least in the next one to two years. The support, maintenance and operations contracts would still survive. It is going to be very challenging for the sourcing teams who would pursue new projects. Employees also would understand the need to make use of the economies of scale and learning to be contributing to the company cost cuts. The first and foremost responsibility would be for everyone in the organization to feel the need to minimize costs, increase productivity and understand that only the best would survive under such a situation. This paradigm would continue at the current environment where supply is over stripped to the market demand. It’s no more a choice but a nomenclature to live within one's means.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
The Broken Bridge - Part 6 and Final
After 2 years of that important conversation that turned our lives altogether is when I received the most unexpected phone call. About her untimely death.
Just before a month of the tragedy, she called me. Telling me about her failing health and the kind of fear that is engulfing her progress in everything in life. She sounded depressed and lost. I have never seen Sindhu being so low and talking about failure, depression and death. First time in life, she was telling me on the arrangements she made for her family back in India and about her property and other things in Germany. I gave her my usual motivational speech, guaranteed her that things will fall in place and she would get better and back to track in life. Once again, I called her to come back to India. This time, Asha joined me in calling her back home. Sindhu promised us that she would come back very soon.
Many times after that distressed call, me and Asha used to talk about Sindhu. Never did we expected that she would come so soon, but this time, wrapped up in a casket. My mind is so heavy and the cars in the distance from where I had been watching them all this while look so tiny to me. Somewhere in the distance I could hear an aeroplane zooming above the building. I wished I took the next flight to Frankfurt. I know I have no reason to do so anymore. The words of Sindhu echoed in my ears. " Asha, I know I need Bala in life. He has become almost everything to me and I also know that it will be equally difficult for me to live without him. But let me tell you the truth. He can never be my husband. Sometimes, you need some people in life, just for what they are and not because what you want them to be in life for you. I am a person who can accept the reality and move on. When I came to India with Bala, one thing that I realised. For me to have his support and emotional bonding, I don't need a commitment called marriage. All I need is an understanding of you that Bala to me is a mentor, guide and a strength who cares for me and helps me to remove my mental blocks to move on with life. As long as you don't suspect our relationship and understand the beautiful bondage of two friends, we don't need to change anything in our lives the way we are living today. I promise you, I had not been his wife anytime. He had been my shoulder to lean on from the day one. If you could accept and be a part of this unique bonding, I think I am all set to go back". I remember Asha suddenly going and embracing Sindhu and giving her a big hug. Later that night, I asked Sindhu, what made her change her decision. She replied, "Asha needs you more than me!". She went back to Frankfurt taking my promise that I would not go there anymore. She broke my bridge! This time for ever!
Just before a month of the tragedy, she called me. Telling me about her failing health and the kind of fear that is engulfing her progress in everything in life. She sounded depressed and lost. I have never seen Sindhu being so low and talking about failure, depression and death. First time in life, she was telling me on the arrangements she made for her family back in India and about her property and other things in Germany. I gave her my usual motivational speech, guaranteed her that things will fall in place and she would get better and back to track in life. Once again, I called her to come back to India. This time, Asha joined me in calling her back home. Sindhu promised us that she would come back very soon.
Many times after that distressed call, me and Asha used to talk about Sindhu. Never did we expected that she would come so soon, but this time, wrapped up in a casket. My mind is so heavy and the cars in the distance from where I had been watching them all this while look so tiny to me. Somewhere in the distance I could hear an aeroplane zooming above the building. I wished I took the next flight to Frankfurt. I know I have no reason to do so anymore. The words of Sindhu echoed in my ears. " Asha, I know I need Bala in life. He has become almost everything to me and I also know that it will be equally difficult for me to live without him. But let me tell you the truth. He can never be my husband. Sometimes, you need some people in life, just for what they are and not because what you want them to be in life for you. I am a person who can accept the reality and move on. When I came to India with Bala, one thing that I realised. For me to have his support and emotional bonding, I don't need a commitment called marriage. All I need is an understanding of you that Bala to me is a mentor, guide and a strength who cares for me and helps me to remove my mental blocks to move on with life. As long as you don't suspect our relationship and understand the beautiful bondage of two friends, we don't need to change anything in our lives the way we are living today. I promise you, I had not been his wife anytime. He had been my shoulder to lean on from the day one. If you could accept and be a part of this unique bonding, I think I am all set to go back". I remember Asha suddenly going and embracing Sindhu and giving her a big hug. Later that night, I asked Sindhu, what made her change her decision. She replied, "Asha needs you more than me!". She went back to Frankfurt taking my promise that I would not go there anymore. She broke my bridge! This time for ever!
The Broken Bridge - Part 5
I could not face Asha. It was almost my umpteenth visit to Frankfurt. Asha started to slowly understand why most of my business is happening in Germany. Fears of her own and not wanting to hear me accept the truth and go ahead with the unexpected twists and turns in my life, Asha never dared to ask me straight. But slowly I could see the change in the way she handled children and sometimes with me.
This time I returned from Frankfurt with my decision. It is not that I have some problem being married to Asha, but because I could not run between two parallel priorities. It is going to be tough to handle but unfortunately if one of your priorities take the maxim, you have to make a decision. This time, I returned to India with Sindhu. Asha as usual maintained her composure which in fact surprised me alot, startled me too.
Three of us were sitting in our living room. I started to speak to Asha. "Asha, I know this is not going to be easy..." She stopped me. "No Bala, I don't want to listen to anything. I don't have the energy or strength to listen to you telling me that you love another woman in life. I cannot accept for what so ever reasons, that I have to go on my own for no fault of mine". I felt very painful. There is justice in her words. But sometimes, I hate to understand why love becomes so blind and what is that binds us for unexpected relationships. First time, I felt guilty. I felt stuck between two important people in life. One who has no other world than me, and the other person vulnerable in the open world. For a moment, I wished I did not meet Sindhu again.
"Asha, for heaven's sake, listen to me. Bala had been my greatest strength and my worst weekness ever. I don't deny that. At the same time, I am not a person to break your relationship and build mine. He had been coming to Frankfurt for almost 5 years now, which I am sure you are aware. But understand that I have got to tell you something. Something that is important to all three of us" Sindhu stopped for a while.
This time I returned from Frankfurt with my decision. It is not that I have some problem being married to Asha, but because I could not run between two parallel priorities. It is going to be tough to handle but unfortunately if one of your priorities take the maxim, you have to make a decision. This time, I returned to India with Sindhu. Asha as usual maintained her composure which in fact surprised me alot, startled me too.
Three of us were sitting in our living room. I started to speak to Asha. "Asha, I know this is not going to be easy..." She stopped me. "No Bala, I don't want to listen to anything. I don't have the energy or strength to listen to you telling me that you love another woman in life. I cannot accept for what so ever reasons, that I have to go on my own for no fault of mine". I felt very painful. There is justice in her words. But sometimes, I hate to understand why love becomes so blind and what is that binds us for unexpected relationships. First time, I felt guilty. I felt stuck between two important people in life. One who has no other world than me, and the other person vulnerable in the open world. For a moment, I wished I did not meet Sindhu again.
"Asha, for heaven's sake, listen to me. Bala had been my greatest strength and my worst weekness ever. I don't deny that. At the same time, I am not a person to break your relationship and build mine. He had been coming to Frankfurt for almost 5 years now, which I am sure you are aware. But understand that I have got to tell you something. Something that is important to all three of us" Sindhu stopped for a while.
The Broken Bridge - Part 4
Asha and kids wanted to come with me on my business trip to Germany. It was summer time for children and I was not able to give them enough time during the last few years and don't remember taking them on a long holiday. So thought I can make this trip a combined one with professional objectives and pleasure time with the family too. After completing my usual work in office, I drove down to the Hotel Hilton. Kids were waiting for me and quickly changed to my casuals and picked the fishing rods and sand castle stuff. Asha commented that sometimes I behave more worse than the kids.... I laughed. Yeah, she is right. After 4 hours in the beach and having good Mexican food on the way back, return to retire in our rooms.
As the night clicked its wings across the black canopy dazzling in a twilight of stars, I could not sleep. My restlessness was new and my intuition was going strong back to my old memories. Slowly I moved away from Asha and kids, and started to walk in the lobby of the lighted Hilton in the night.
I could not believe my eyes when a woman walked into the lobby with her travel bags and was checking into the hotel where I stayed. This is the woman whom I know so well. Never thought that after 3 years I would meet her again. " Sindhu.........." I gave a call in the most slightest voice possible. She turned and gave me a surprise look. " Bala!... Oh,what a pleasant surprise. I never thought we would meet again." So did I. I asked her about her husband and child and her work. Sitting opposite to me in the lobby, she did not speak. Her eyes conveyed her loneliness and betrayal. "Its all over! " She said. I could not ask her more. As she checked into their new hotel room, I also went in with her. Suddenly, she turned and hugged me tightly and cried. I did not stop her. An old friend lending a shoulder to shed the tears. I felt so lifted being able to stand beside her and solace her.
It was in the morning, when I introduced Asha to Sindhu. Sindhu was happy to see my daughter and son and joined us in the long drives and picnics in the same week. Asha initially raised so many questions as to why Sindhu is moved to a hotel, where she is working and what happened to her family and so on. I could not reply to her for I myself do not have those answers. Sometimes, silence is better when words may hurt people's thoughts.
After15 days, of both business and holidaying, it was time for us to return to India. Loads of shopping, memories captured in pictures, and tokens of the places we visited made kids and Asha very excited. Inside me started a train of thoughts on how to leave Sindhu and go back. Made an attempt telling her to come back and start life all over again. She refused, this time, the one decision I expected from her.
Sindhu came to airport to see us off. This time, I found her face brightened up. There are no traces of dejection or a battle in life that she is undergoing. After the flight took off from Frankfurt, it flashed in my head on what made Sindhu look afresh. A new hope. A hope that emerged from my interaction with her. I know, that very soon, I am coming back to Frankfurt.
As the night clicked its wings across the black canopy dazzling in a twilight of stars, I could not sleep. My restlessness was new and my intuition was going strong back to my old memories. Slowly I moved away from Asha and kids, and started to walk in the lobby of the lighted Hilton in the night.
I could not believe my eyes when a woman walked into the lobby with her travel bags and was checking into the hotel where I stayed. This is the woman whom I know so well. Never thought that after 3 years I would meet her again. " Sindhu.........." I gave a call in the most slightest voice possible. She turned and gave me a surprise look. " Bala!... Oh,what a pleasant surprise. I never thought we would meet again." So did I. I asked her about her husband and child and her work. Sitting opposite to me in the lobby, she did not speak. Her eyes conveyed her loneliness and betrayal. "Its all over! " She said. I could not ask her more. As she checked into their new hotel room, I also went in with her. Suddenly, she turned and hugged me tightly and cried. I did not stop her. An old friend lending a shoulder to shed the tears. I felt so lifted being able to stand beside her and solace her.
It was in the morning, when I introduced Asha to Sindhu. Sindhu was happy to see my daughter and son and joined us in the long drives and picnics in the same week. Asha initially raised so many questions as to why Sindhu is moved to a hotel, where she is working and what happened to her family and so on. I could not reply to her for I myself do not have those answers. Sometimes, silence is better when words may hurt people's thoughts.
After15 days, of both business and holidaying, it was time for us to return to India. Loads of shopping, memories captured in pictures, and tokens of the places we visited made kids and Asha very excited. Inside me started a train of thoughts on how to leave Sindhu and go back. Made an attempt telling her to come back and start life all over again. She refused, this time, the one decision I expected from her.
Sindhu came to airport to see us off. This time, I found her face brightened up. There are no traces of dejection or a battle in life that she is undergoing. After the flight took off from Frankfurt, it flashed in my head on what made Sindhu look afresh. A new hope. A hope that emerged from my interaction with her. I know, that very soon, I am coming back to Frankfurt.
The Broken Bridge - Part 3
"Bala, Can you drop me at home for my car is gone for service?'' Sindhu called me. I was more than ready to offer her a drop, on condition that she would go for a coffee with me. "You guys are all like this!" . She gave me a free statement along with her acceptance. Moccha, our favourite coffee shop is always full of energy, and young crowd hanging around. Sindhu also loves both coffee and Moccha...so it was my pleasant evening when I could go there with her.
She is such a lively girl that I used to keep on watching her while she is at work. Multi-tasking specialist and very friendly person. A person who strongly believe that women makes better managers as they can get things done by intuitive management. A very revolutionary thoughts of this young woman inspired not just me but lot of my colleagues in senior management.
One day, she called at my desk. I was in midst of my phone call and asked her to sit. She was looking very tensed and troubled. After the call, I asked her what is bothering her. She forwarded her resignation to me. I advised that she is recognised here and have lot of growth opportunities and she should not go just because she gets a salary hike. As usual she was adamant. Sometimes, she is so strong in her decisions, despite the fact that she will not think of it, once taken even if it proves wrong to her later. Knowing her attitude, I signed the acknowledgement and handed over to her.
"Bala, will you not ask me to stay back!" She gave me a jerk with her question and a statement. I replied to her that I already made an attempt to stop her from going. "No, I am not asking you to stop me as my Boss, but you could try to stop me as my................." She stopped there. Took the piece of paper I signed and walked out of the room. I stood from my seat in a kind of disbelief. What did I hear from her now? My mind was boggling me like never before.
She is such a lively girl that I used to keep on watching her while she is at work. Multi-tasking specialist and very friendly person. A person who strongly believe that women makes better managers as they can get things done by intuitive management. A very revolutionary thoughts of this young woman inspired not just me but lot of my colleagues in senior management.
One day, she called at my desk. I was in midst of my phone call and asked her to sit. She was looking very tensed and troubled. After the call, I asked her what is bothering her. She forwarded her resignation to me. I advised that she is recognised here and have lot of growth opportunities and she should not go just because she gets a salary hike. As usual she was adamant. Sometimes, she is so strong in her decisions, despite the fact that she will not think of it, once taken even if it proves wrong to her later. Knowing her attitude, I signed the acknowledgement and handed over to her.
"Bala, will you not ask me to stay back!" She gave me a jerk with her question and a statement. I replied to her that I already made an attempt to stop her from going. "No, I am not asking you to stop me as my Boss, but you could try to stop me as my................." She stopped there. Took the piece of paper I signed and walked out of the room. I stood from my seat in a kind of disbelief. What did I hear from her now? My mind was boggling me like never before.
The Broken Bridge - Part 2
Asha and me returned home after a long day. The day was full of various emotions and pain. I stood there among hundreds of people, friends, associates, well-wishers and family when she was getting ready for her final journey. The end is only to the mortal remains of a human being who transformed lives around her. Along with me, I have heard people who kept on telling that there can be no death to the person who lives in the thoughts of others. May be this is what is called Atma (The Soul) and its eternity. I think this tragedy had made me give myself a spiritual look, which otherwise was a distant activity in my life.
All through the 24 hours that passed, Asha did not speak to me. I could see a different pain in her eyes. A look that only scared me more. I thought it is natural when a dear one passes away. Did not want to think anything more, and I just went and tried to catch up a quick sleep.
After couple of days, everything started to become normal. Kids started to go to school, and Asha as usual started to become busy at home. I had no rhyme or reason to be away from work. So I called Ram and packed myself to work.
After 3 days of being away, I had loads of tasks to attend. Meetings that got post phoned, proposals that are pending from review, and outlook was over pouring with the mails. By the time I realised that I am hungry, it was 4 pm. For a while I closed my laptop and took a walk to the office cafeteria. With a cup of coffee and a sandwich, I took my usual table and looked outside the window. The cars are all like little ants running behind each other. The fourth lane was full of trucks. Here everything runs. People, Cars, Machines, Shares, Money, in fact everything in the world today just runs! Run! I grimed at myself for not having born in the previous century. Life would have been more peaceful.
Within few days, things started to become much more normal. Once in a while Asha mentioning about the grieving family. I behaved as if I did not listen to her. But inside me, there started a vacuum and a sense of guilt. May be I could have changed the things for her. May be I could have handled issues differently. May be, may be , may be- I got wild at myself for this May be!. Sometimes, just like the ship wrecks, few broken bridges also haunt for life. My broken bridge is no different.
All through the 24 hours that passed, Asha did not speak to me. I could see a different pain in her eyes. A look that only scared me more. I thought it is natural when a dear one passes away. Did not want to think anything more, and I just went and tried to catch up a quick sleep.
After couple of days, everything started to become normal. Kids started to go to school, and Asha as usual started to become busy at home. I had no rhyme or reason to be away from work. So I called Ram and packed myself to work.
After 3 days of being away, I had loads of tasks to attend. Meetings that got post phoned, proposals that are pending from review, and outlook was over pouring with the mails. By the time I realised that I am hungry, it was 4 pm. For a while I closed my laptop and took a walk to the office cafeteria. With a cup of coffee and a sandwich, I took my usual table and looked outside the window. The cars are all like little ants running behind each other. The fourth lane was full of trucks. Here everything runs. People, Cars, Machines, Shares, Money, in fact everything in the world today just runs! Run! I grimed at myself for not having born in the previous century. Life would have been more peaceful.
Within few days, things started to become much more normal. Once in a while Asha mentioning about the grieving family. I behaved as if I did not listen to her. But inside me, there started a vacuum and a sense of guilt. May be I could have changed the things for her. May be I could have handled issues differently. May be, may be , may be- I got wild at myself for this May be!. Sometimes, just like the ship wrecks, few broken bridges also haunt for life. My broken bridge is no different.
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